Skz Imagines 🖤

Selfish - Han Jisung

Selfish Han Jisung

" Don't you want your food Dori? " You said to the cat that was hugging your legs instead of stuffing its face like the other two.

You sat down, confused at what the one little kitten was doing. Was she sick? Did you have to take her to the vet?

Instead she just hopped onto your lap and purred untill she found the right spot to settle down as if she was waiting for you to pet her.

Chuckling softly, you did as she wished. Somehow the once dusty environment around you felt soothing and calm, as you delivered short and soft caresses towards Dori's neck.

Your glassy eyes told it all. How you remember the first time dori came home, finding two other of its kind in the big hall. You could see she felt lost within the four walls of your living room being a drastic comparison to what she lived in, in the wild.

Very scratchy indeed, you thought at first. But those scratches from Dori led you to becoming the most close with her even though the other two loved your presence as well. Because when Lee Know and his members had schedules, you were the one who was looking out for them.

" They're definitely gonna miss you. Especially that one. " Han Jisung said, leaning onto the doorframe and looking over at what was taking so long for you to come out.

" I'll miss them too, Han. Them, this place, this room, your members, everything and everyone. Especially you. " You whispered, trying not to spill the tears that were on the verge of falling down.

Finally after being their neighbour, and falling in love with Han Jisung in the process of helping the group out when they were busy, you were leaving the place. To fullfill your dreams which you had pushed back.

" Y/n- "

" Don't. I've been selfish for one time in my life and I don't want to feel any more regret. " You said immediately getting up and disturbing the poor cat in the process.

" I-I just wanted to apologise. "

You turned, your face showing a mixture of surprise and sadness.

" For? "

" For letting you be selfless. For not realising that you have dreams, for being too greedy and wanting everything to happen at my pace and at my will. I- " Han started, but couldn't continue with his words as his sobs were choking him from saying any more and looked away.

Now it was your turn to look at the boxes that you had packed around you, instead of looking at the man in front of you,  causing the whole room to be dusty. Yet Lee Know still had the audacity to leave his cats with you. But you knew deep inside that he did it on purpose because he wanted you to say your proper goodbyes before you left.

There you both sat, refusing to look at each other while you sobbed. While Sooni and Doongi weren't bothered, Dori stayed by your side as if she knew that something was wrong.
You bit your lip trying to remove the memories of yours in this place, but hated that it would haunt you every time you would meet a cat, or a charming guy, or when you listen to a Straykids song.

Yet sometimes you had to be selfish. And you despised that feeling.

Locking your door, you were met by eight familiar faces, with four of them crying and the other four trying to hold their tears. You were indeed fond of these men, but not untill now you realised how fond.

With Chan, Hyunjin, Seungmin and Changbin it was easy, they all wished you good luck and you could actually smile back in return. But with the other four, it broke your heart.

With Lee know, although he claimed he didn't cry, you saw how red his eyes were. He smiled and thanked you for taking care of his cats so much.

With a heavy heart Jeongin said goodbye, his tears wetting the edge of your sweater. But with Felix he refused to let you go, slyly fitting one of his boxes of cookies into your backpack.

You heard Jeongin sob harder in the background as you approached Han. Your tears were already streaming down, but you still managed to say,

" Thank you Han Jisung, for being my first love."

" Thank you Y/n. " He somehow responded in between his sobs as you parted away from home.

Or atleast what you used to call home.