𝙚𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙡𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 ᵐⁱᵗˢᵘʸᵃ

08

to the love of my life,

it's a surprise that i still got to see you before i go. maybe it was the universe doing me a favor. still, i'm sorry for leaving you abruptly after i finally got to say "i love you" to you.

the park was nice, don't you think? it really set the mood for that lousy confession of mine. was i selfish for not waiting for what you had to say? i'm sorry for that, by the way.

this is going to be the last letter i'll ever write to you, so i might as well go all out.

i love you, takashi mitsuya.

i love you so much that it hurts.

it hurts whenever i see you with someone who isn't me. it hurts whenever you laugh at something i didn't say.

but the pain is what gave me life. the pain is what told me that loving someone as perfect as you is nothing but a fantasy.

even then, you make me feel like the happiest person on earth even if i'm far from it. i don't regret anything i've ever done in my life, and i think that it's because of you.

though, it looks like my love for you isn't enough to make me want to stay alive.

i felt the most alive when i was with you, but i'm alone right now.

please be happy, takashi. find love, find life. but don't look for me. please don't find me.

i know you'd do this even when i don't say it, but take care of your sisters. take care of your friends. please, take care of yourself.

i love you. i wish i had heard what you wanted to reply to it when i told you.

my heart is full because of you, and i'll be dying with no regrets. so for the last time, even with the ink of my pen giving up on me, i love you from the bottom of my heart.

from the person who loved you the most,
y/n l/n.