𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖈𝖎𝖔𝖚𝖘

chapter three

My darling Dean,

You'll never guess who visited me today - the minister of magic! Apparently my lunatic dad has escaped Azkaban and the prophet is having a field day with it.

According to Fudge, useless old fool, Rita Skeeter has taken it upon herself to reveal where I'm living during summer, so if I don't return to hogwarts this year, it's because my dear old dad has slaughtered me with the kind aid of Rita Skeeter shoving her fat nose into other people's business.

So you can probably guess that the cuppa with the minister went well. I had to take him to Rosie's as well! But we didn't sit at my favourite table so my regular visits aren't ruined by him being a dick. I ended up storming out and telling him to pay for the cake. Oh, and I told him he can tell Rita Skeeter where to shove her bullshit articles.

I wasn't really writing to tell you about that, guess I got carried away.

How're you doing Dean?

How're your parents? I miss all of you so much!

I hope you're having a great summer!

Are you going away to Dorset again this summer? You'll have to let me know the address if you are so I can send my owl to the right place, you know Minnie gets confused.

My summers going great, apart from the minister's surprise drop in. Molly, one of the older girls, showed me the best shop to get vodka from if I want any, all you have to do is flirt with Tommy and he doesn't even make you pay, he gets too distracted staring at your tits. Which, of course is disgusting, but he's gunna do it anyway so I might as well use it to my advantage.

And before you get all 'no Ellie don't become and alcoholic!' I won't, don't worry, it's just a bit of fun with the girls because nothing else round here is entertaining.

Gulches isn't the worst this year, the place is still a broken dump, but Michelle tries so hard, and we always have food on the table (even if it smells like feet) so I can't complain too much.

I miss you so much Dean, I know I already said that, but it's true.

I cant wait to see you in September!

I've put some galleons in the envelope. Buy some dung bombs for me when you go to Diagon Alley please? The ministry people that take me are strictly no detours, books only, yuck. I'm so excited to go to hogsmeade together this year.

Love you loads,

Your best friend in the entire world (and don't you dare ever forget it or replace me)

Elizabeth Marlene Black

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Dear my lovely Elizabeth,

THE MINISTER OF MAGIC CAME TO SEE YOU? How is it that you always manage to have a more exciting summer than me?

Though that doesn't sound too fun, good for you for sticking up for yourself, and getting free cake, talk about girl bossing.

Also, fuck Rita Skeeter.

Yes, we're away in Dorset this year, I'll send you the address when I find out, we're not going for a few weeks, I'll update you, don't worry. I still can't believe you named your owl after a Professor! And McGonagall hates that you call her Minnie!

Me and my parents are good thank you, how're you doing? And don't lie and say you're great, I know you must be finding all of this hard, I'm always here for you Ellie.

Also, mum says you can come stay for two weeks before we go away if Michelle will clear it? I really hope she does, I miss you so so much.

Ellie, we are thirteen, why are you drinking vodka? Please don't get hurt, and I really hope Sirius Black doesn't slaughter you, I miss you and hogwarts would be so shit without you always causing chaos.

I'm glad you have Michelle looking out for you, it's a crap situation but at least you have a nice lady to watch over you. I'm proud of you Ellie.

Course I'll get you dungbombs, who do you think I am? Hogsmeade will be amazing, I can't wait to go to Zonko's together!

See you before September hopefully!

Love you loads,

You're best friend, and no I won't forget it.

Dean Thomas.

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My dearest Dean,

I just realised how odd we would seem if someone saw that we addressed our letters to each other like this. But if you don't write to your best friend pretending to be their lover in the twenties, are you really their best friend?

Anyways, I'm glad you're all good! I'm great, honestly, don't worry about me! I barely know anything about Sirius Black, he's just like a sperm donor, no feelings attached, they'll catch him soon and he'll be be in Azkaban and out of my mind!

I'll ask Michelle about staying with you, I think she'll say yes, she's met your mam before and did background checks or whatever, so I don't see why not. Also, did you get a new owl? He's really cute. What's his name?

Tell your mam I love her so much and really hope I can come see you all!

ps. stop sending your letters during the day! One of the tiny kids nearly had a heart attack when an owl flew into the bloody place! I'll have the minister knocking on my door again and I don't know if I can refrain from punching him.

All my love,

Your best friend, glad you haven't forgotten,

Elizabeth Marlene Black.

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Dear my lovely Ellie,

Sending letters to my secret lover sounds so much better than my friend, no offence.

I don't believe that you're okay one bit, you think you can lie to me? Hun, I've been your best friend since first year, I know you. I bet you're bored, and no matter how tough you are, you're definitely scared of Sirius Black.

I really really hope you can come stay.

Yes! We have a new owl! He's so cute isn't he? He's called Artemis, mum named him, I wanted to call him Billy Bob.

Sorry I forgot the nighttime rule! I was too excited to ask you to stay, oops!

All my love,

Your bestest friend in the entire world,

Dean Thomas.

_____

Dean,

I can come!

See you tomorrow, I'll floo.

Ellie xxx