Chapter 25

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Arguably the best part of all of this chaos is the feeling of relief that suddenly courses through my stomach. Now I don't have to keep hiding from Ethan. Or anyone. No more stupid petulant plans trying to get his attention because I have now, even if I don't want it. All the plotting and skirting around the issue at hand is done. And I couldn't be more relieved about that.

But that relief is quickly overshadowed by every other negative feeling that comes crashing over me like a wave of emotions. Ethan locks his phone and puts his hands in his pockets, looking down. The blush is still on his face. He looks... horrified.

And that's literally the worst reaction he could have.

Feeling sick to my stomach, I look away from him, trying to focus on something else.

"Alisa? Are you even listening to me?" Ella pokes me in the side. In these few short moments, I completely forgot we were even having a conversation and I wrack my brain, trying to remember what she was saying.

"What?" I ask, failing to remember. She rolls her eyes.

"Is there something you wanna tell me about you and Ethan?" She hisses.

So much for focusing on something else. "No." I say sharply. She raises her eyebrows, perhaps at my tone, but I'm past caring. I just want to curl up and cry.

"Hey, I think I'm gonna pack." I say to nobody in particular. Everyone stops talking to look at me and I show a smile. Despite the fact I think I look like I want to fall off the earth (for the record, I do), it seems to work on everyone. They tease me about being organised a little before letting me go. I don't look at Ethan again.

All I can remember is the look on his face when he read the message. He really looked horrified. Like certifiably disgusted.

I try not to cry as I pack my bags for the flight home tomorrow. David texts me asking if I'm okay but I just send him a smiley face and tell him I have a headache, hoping he doesn't bother me. I'm done within the hour and because I'm in such a down mood, I go to sleep immediately.

The next morning, I wake up to a knock on the door. Ella's already up and in the shower which means that I have to get it. I really don't want to because I don't particularly want to talk to anyone, especially if it's one of my friends. However, another knock on the door causes Ella to yell at me to answer the door.

So I stand up and put my pants on. It's a move that's supposed to be symbolic to putting my big girl panties on but then I still feel stupid. I wander to the door and look through the peephole and sigh with relief when I see Anthony standing there with a goofy smile on his face. He poises his fist to knock again but I yank the door open before he can.

"Oh –Alisa! Hey!" He squints at me. "You look – you look horrible."

"I just woke up." I mumble. "What's up?"

"Your pants are on backwards." He says.

"Anthony, what do you want?"

He frowns. "I just wanted to let you know that the rest of the gang is going down for breakfast now. If you wanted to join us, that is, but your pants are on –"

"Hey." I look away from Anthony into the blue eyes of Ethan and feel like I'm going to throw up. He has them trained on Anthony.

He gulps. My head starts to hurt and I have to look away from him before he makes me ruin my backwards pants.

"Um, Anthony, Janet wants you." he says. Or at least I think that's what he says.

"Okay, I'll go see what she wants. Alisa, I'll see you downstairs?"

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