Loving You as a Friend [BL]

Chapter 7: It Makes Me Feel Safe

Alexis suddenly stood up, finally snapping back to reality. He was about to call out to Darcel and Lucius when he noticed their worried expressions, quickly flashing an apologetic smile. "Darc, Lu, why don't we go explore the garden?" He really wanted to talk to them before doing anything rashly, squeezing their hands tighter.

They got the clue, nodding as they stood up to inform the adults who let them go. Alexis was a little absent-minded, with Lucius leading them further into the garden. Darcel didn't know how to offer support so he simply grabbed onto Alexis's arm and tightened his grip. They had finally stopped in a place not too far from the tea party but it was hidden from their sight.

"Lex, are you alright? What's wrong?" Lucius sat down and patted on the ground next to him, inviting Alexis. He sat down while explaining, "Darc, Lu, I'm worried." He glanced to see their expressions before continuing, "What if I acted too rashly? Would it have been better if we told our parents about our second element?"

"What are you worried about? Didn't we say that we trusted you?"

"Lex... We trust you so we hope you can trust us too." Darcel backed up Lucius, both of them had a feeling that Alexis was hiding something from them but they still chose to trust him.

"But what if what I chose to do, put you in danger? And if you got hurt..." Alexis's body began to tremble, he didn't want to think about the possibility of them dying. Even if he decided to live as Alexis, he couldn't just let go of 'Fujisaki Shin'. Darcel and Lucius were the 【game Alexis】childhood friends and he himself, in his previous life, had two childhood friends too.

He didn't want to think about their names because he knew he missed his previous world too much. The thought of never being able to see them again caused Shin to lock his precious memories away so that they would never surface while he was on his mission of changing the game's directions. "Lex, please trust us. We can help you too, please don't do everything yourself." Lucius bought Alexis's head to his shoulder, pulling his body to lean against him.

"Lex, even if we can't do much, we're still your friends. We care about you but we want to protect you too." Darcel grabbed his hands, squeezing them together tightly, "Lex..." He glanced at Lucius, who gave him a nod, turning back to Alexis before continuing. "Lex, we like you. We really, really like you and we don't like it when you can't rely on us. Both Lu and I like it when you smile and have fun with us. We feel sad when you're not smiling but we feel even sadder if we can't support you."

"Lex, we don't know why you feel like you did something wrong, but the two of us will stay with you until you're ready." Lucius began to stroke his head, attempting to soothe him. Alexis lifted his head to face them, "But what if you disappear... like them?" His eyes were beginning to tear up, his vision was slowly becoming blurry. His last words were barely audible.

Both of them froze in their tracks, their eyes flashed at his last words, quickly returning to normal before Shin could pick up anything.

"LEX!" Darcel cupped his face, "Stop thinking about the 'what ifs'. We're here, alive and in front of you. We're not going anywhere until you're ready. And even if you already told us everything, we are never going to leave you alone. We don't want to leave you alone."

"But what if telling you guys to hide your second element is the reason why you get injured in the future? What if it could've been prevented if I never told you to hide it in the first place? What if the reason why you died was because of me?"

"If you're so scared, why don't you let us reveal our second element. This way we can protect you and you don't have to worry about us dying." Lucius moved Alexis so that he would hug him from behind, leaning onto his back.

"And Lex, if you're still afraid, you can tell your father. And as much as it frustrates me, he can protect you better than us. The Archduke can find you a magic tutor while covering your second element." Darcel lightly touched Alexis's forehead with his, "And if that's not enough, we can train with you too. If you don't want to be alone, we'll always be by your side. So please, trust us as much as we do."

Alexis was barely holding in his tears as he listened to their reassurance; they were blasting away his insecurities so easily. As much as he wanted to trust them with everything, he still felt out of place. "Lex, even if you never are able to fully trust us, we will continue to stay by your side regardless. Because we trust you with everything. And we know you want the best for us too."

Just as Alexis was about to refute their unwavering trust in him, Lucius disrupted him. By the time he finished, Alexis couldn't hold in any longer, finally letting go of the tears that ran down his cheeks. Darcel was patiently wiping away the tears with his handkerchief while Lucius was gently patting his head.

Shin felt guilty for placing all of the pressure onto them. He wanted to tell them about his memories but what if they rejected him? He couldn't go back to his world anyways. If they rejected, Shin wouldn't know how he would react. He already couldn't see his two childhood friends anymore so if he lost Darcel and Lucius too, would he even be able to move on from it?

He was really scared of them retracting their trust in him, he didn't want to ruin their future because of his selfish desires of wanting to live a carefree life. He knew it wasn't possible considering their status but he couldn't help but act on it. Shin didn't want them to be bound by the game's setting. He wanted them to live freely, not as a character but as a person.

----

It didn't take long for Alexis to calm down. After all, both of his friends were there. "Thank you Darc, Lu. You guys always seem to see me at my worst."

Lucius tightened his grip around Alexis, reassuring him, "Alexis, it doesn't matter if you're sad or happy, as long as you're by our side, nothing else matters to us." Darcel nodded in agreement, "Even if the world is against you, we will always be by your side. We will always trust and believe in you."

Alexis nodded at their words, finally closing his dry, puffy eyes. Lucius guided his head to rest on his shoulder while Darcel sat next to Alexis, intertwining their hands. Alexis found comfort whenever they held hands, reaching out for Lucius's hand as well. "Let's stay until you're ready to go back."

"I don't think you want everyone to see your puffy eyes." Darcel reached out to touch his eyes before leaning his head against Alexis's shoulder. "Hehe, I guess you're right. I like staying together with you guys. It makes me feel safe."