They say that the only way to remove the pain is to go through it.
Walang ibang paraan. Kailangan mo siyang pagdaanan. Pwede mong iwasan, pwede kang makipagtaguan, pwede mong i-delay, pero hindi mo pwedeng hindi harapin.
That's the thing about pain, no one is exempted from feeling it. Kung pwede nga lang ipa-void yung pakiramdam, bakit hindi 'di ba? It would have saved a million lives. Kaso hindi e, pain will always be part of the equation. It's part of what you have signed up for. Kasama sa kontrata ng pag-ibig ang posibilidad na masaktan ka. It's not all hearts and flowers.
Maraming beses na akong nasaktan noon na akala ko alam ko na kung paano umahon. You see, I am the type of person who manages pain quite well. A friend even told me once that I am too cold, too unbothered. Hindi mo raw alam kung naapektuhan ba kasi parang walang emosyon. Kaya kahit ako nasorpresa. I know myself too well that I know when something is unusual. Ang down side nga lang kapag self-aware ka, you have tendencies to become too hard on yourself. Bakit? Kasi pakiramdam mo alam mo na lahat kaya iniisip mo na kayang-kaya mo na. That's why when you feel like you are not progressing or stuck somewhere, mas lalo kang nadi-disappoint.
Pain could be tricky. Minsan kasi pakiramdam mo hindi na masakit, okay ka na. Then, after a while, your feelings shift again. It's a series of highs and lows. Minsan mapapaisip ka kung nababaliw ka na ba kasi paiba-iba ka nang nararamdaman. But that's normal. It's part of going through the pain.
Walang sugat na instantly naghihilom pag nilagyan mo ng gamot. 'Di ba ang sugat ilang araw mong huhugasan at gagamutin bago matuyo? Tapos kapag natuyo na, hindi naman agad nawawala, e. May langib pa rin na iingatan mo kasi pag nadali ulit, dudugo na naman. Tapos kapag naman tuluyan nang natuyo tapos natuklap na yung langib, mag-iiwan ng marka, 'di ba? Sometimes, the scars fade over time, but most of the time, they don't. Lalo na pag malalim talaga.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that it will always be painful or na imposible nang mag-move forward. What I'm saying is, through time and effort, the pain will transform you. It will be in a different form. It will be a lesson learned or a reminder of the Lord's grace in your life.
Hindi madali, at napakahabang proseso at oras bago ka matapos dito sa phase na' to. But it's okay, hindi mo kailangang magmadali. It's okay to grieve, it's okay to cry. It's okay to mourn for that part of you that you have lost. You owe this to yourself.
But remember one thing, going through the pain doesn't mean you have to go through it alone. You have your family and friends to back you up. It's going to be a journey, one hell of a journey, so be ready.
