an epistolary.
Aisha Riego, a girl in senior high who is also known on twitter had never fallen inlove in her entire life until Enzo Escalde came as one of his bestfriend's childhood friend.
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start: september 15, 2021
end: oc...
Dumeretso kaming dalawa sa rooftop sa bahay. Inalalayan niya ako pataas sa hagdan dahil madilim na. Pagtaas namin ay binuksan ko agad ang ilaw. And there..I saw the beautiful city lights of Manila with him.
We both sat sa sofa na nandon sa rooftop. Ginagawa rin daw kasi ito nila mommy na tambayan kapag silang dalawa lang at walang trabaho sabi nung mga katulong sa bahay.
"I saw your sad smile earlier about the resthouse. Are you okay?" He suddenly asked.
"Ahh.." I didn't expect him to ask me that. "Wala naman. Naisip ko lang kung kailan din kaya ako." Tumawa pa ako. "Masaya naman ako para kila Mommy pero, you know, sana, someday, ako naman." I sighed and glanced at the beautiful night sky.
After seating down ay tahimik naming pinagmasdan ang mga ilaw.
Ready na ba talaga akong makinig? Pano kung masaktan nanaman ako? Paano kung bumalik nanaman ako sa dati? Kakayanin ko pa ba ulit?
"I'm sorry, Ai. I'm sorry, bub." He spoke. "Sorry for hurting you. Sorry for making you worry." I just listened. "S-Sorry for ruining you, Aisha." He said and tear from eyes escaped.
"It was so unexpected. Kaklase ko si Aila sa engineering." Panimula niya. "Lagi siyang malungkot. Walang kasama at walang buhay but she still managed to do good in class. Then one day, I was so drained. Hindi kita matawagan dahil gabi sayo at alam ko rin namang napapagod ka din don, I went to our school's rooftop. It was 6am when she tried to end her life." Enzo said and bowed down.
I was..shocked. Hindi ko alam ang sasabihin ko.
"She was about to jump. Tatalon na sana siya pero nahawakan ko iyong kamay niya. She was mad that I did that. Nagalit siya saakin dahil gusto niya na daw magpahinga pero pinigilan ko pa siya. I told her she can rest without doing that pero ang sabi niya, hindi ko raw kasi alam kung gaano na kasakit kaya sana pinabayaan ko nalamg siyang tumalon. Then after that, she cried. I asked her what's her name then she answered, Aila Coreen Ramores Zorilla. Apelyido iyon ng partner ni Kaia. She told me na, pinsan niya si Isaiah." He bowed his head again. "Her mom died because of sickness then his dad got married after her mom died. Then, her family, ayaw sakaniya. Si Isaiah lang ang kumupkop sakaniya, patago pa. Isaiah's mom doesn't like her, kaya kailangan siyang itago ni Isaiah. She was d-diagnosed with depression after that. Then, kinausap na ako ni Isaiah."
Hindi ko alam ang sasabihin ko. Pero sana, sana nandon ako para natulungan ko siya.
"I wish I was there when she needed someone." I whispered.
Nakuha ko na agad ang susunod na gustong sabihin ni Enzo. Maraming ganiyan sa pelikula at kahit sa mga example cases sa med school ay may ganyan din. Families are very desperate to make their other members happy and away from the dark. Kahit na may nasasaktan din dahil doon, parang She's dating the gangster. Athena's mom asked Kenji to give another chance kasi si Kenji nalang ang rason ni Athena para mabuhay.
And in our life, Enzo was our Kenji, Aila was the real Athena and I was just the Athena who tried to play along. In the end, they lived happily ever after and I was still stuck in loving him.
"Did you love her?" I asked and tried to plaster a smile on my face.
"I was happy with her." He replied.
"I'm happy for you, Enzo. I'm proud of what you've become now. Masaya akong makita kang kinaya mo ang lahat kahit hindi ako ang katabi mo."
"Aisha, mahal kita." Sabi niya at humarap saakin.
A tear fell from both of our eyes.
"Kailangan ka ni Aila." I said and smiled.
"Ikaw ang kailangan ko. Aisha, you're my life." He said. I looked down to hide my tears.
Ikaw rin ang buhay ko pero hindi talaga yata tayo pwede.
"I was, Enzo. I was." I still smiled without looking at him. "And until now, you're still my life." I said. "Pero, hindi talaga yata tayo para sa isa't isa, Mr. Transferee." I chuckled painfully and looked down again.
Ang sakit naman.
What's more painful is I never felt to be his, officially and he never felt to be mine officialy.
"Baka sa susunod, tayo na talaga." I whispered to him and hugged him tight, like it was my last.
I hugged him like its our last. I hugged him as tight as I can because I know I can never love someone else the way I loved him so much.
"I love you, Mr. Transferee." I whispered in his ears and kissed his forehead before leaving him.
Everything was too painful for us. Maybe we deserve to rest this time.
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