To you

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just showered, Sipping my last glass of wine while rubbing my legs with that baby oil.
I am so proud of myself cause that cherry candle Was a good choice.
Girl, it's time take a deep breath, and take that mask off. (Bloody tears on the way)
...
I am depressed, stressed and tired.
My anxiety is so high that I look drunk.
And at the top of it ;
I've lost my best friend, the only one i have ever loved is gone and been replaced by this stranger who keep  hurting me whenever he got the chance and acting like nothing ever happened.
Promised to change only to become worst.
I tried and tried but seems like it's never fucking enough.
At first I thought he yelled only because he was just angry, though I could handle...
But we took a turn where real faces started to show.
Being disrespected.
Being lying to.
Bitch was my new name.
my own mother been yelled at with people witnessing.
I even being slapped.
Never been sorry, not even once.
Why?
Because When people are sorry, they don't do the same mistakes to hurt on purpose.
I only have to accept and live with it otherwise I'm ungrateful. Is that it?
....
Did I Had to explain with bloody eyes how i wanted to be loved while I was giving my all ?
We did gave Each other our heart? Didn't we?
I did.
Do You love me?
Do you?
Really?
Yes?
So why degrading, humiliating my name with my "friend" look that fun?
why flirting?
Why lying?
Why?
Who did I gave myself to.

...

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