Shaun And Lea: Made for each other

Part 3: Back to San Jose

My comeback started when the garage went bankrupt and I started searching the internet for job openings in companies in my field, in one of these searches I found out that a large automobile developer was recruiting engineers to work in new branches in Silicon Valley, one of them was in San Jose. I did online interviews for all of them.
Three days later I received two calls from Mountain View and San Jose offices and a week's deadline to decide. A few hours later, coincidentally or not, the discussion with my brother took place and advanced my decision.
On the one hand a new place that represented starting from scratch, strangely enough the idea did not excite me. And on the other hand the city that I knew well. Truth be told, I never liked San Jose, I always felt out of place, alone, I didn't create strong bonds with people I could call friends. But when I met Shaun I was sure that in him I had the security of a real friend, something I couldn't see in any person in that stone jungle where everyone saw me as an opponent in a fight for jobs and promotions.
San Jose was a competitive place for my career, but Shaun was there. I knew that after a hard day I could put him in tomato juice and together we would go on, singing tires, to an adventure with tequila and karaoke.
And who knows, with a little luck my old apartment might still be vacant. It was with these positive considerations in mind that I decided.

"What could go wrong this time? It was worth a try."

My life would change a lot since then. Almost three years later, looking back I can happily conclude that it was the most assertive move I have ever made.

Cautions and warnings

By the time we were able to let go of each other's arms the sun was rising stronger in the sky.
I heard the fireman who had given me information during the early hours of the morning call out to me and say:

"Lea, the last ambulance is leaving now. Park has just returned to the hospital. You and Shaun need to go too, to check everything is okay. After all __he said looking at me and then at Shaun__, you've been through a lot of stress and tension today. I know__he chuckled__you seem to be doing just fine now. But I advise you to go just in case.
"Is that your car?
He pointed to the parking lot about twenty yards ahead of us, where I left the tomato juice parked the night before__I think you and Shaun should take the ambulance, you've been without sleep and food for hours and it's not advisable to drive in this condition. I talked to one of the cops and he'll make sure your car stays here without being towed until tomorrow."

"Great! Thank you so much."

I released the ball of air that was stuck in my throat from the tension of the moment. I felt reassured that he hadn't asked about fines and car insurance, and that the thought of driving home after everything had already crossed my mind and didn't excite me.

"He's right, Lea. You have to go to the hospital. I can order some tests, X-rays, and have Claire examine you. Women prefer to be examined by doctors."

I watched intently, delighted with what he said. Shaun could be cute and totally diligent with me in any circumstance, and here, he was being selfless because he needed support as much as I did. These qualities have always made me think of him as the extraordinary man he is.
The fireman nodded in agreement, turned and we watched him walk briskly away to join a group of firemen who were examining the rubble outside the bar.
Our faces turned at the same time, the sunlight reflected in the blue eyes that hovered above me, causing a flickering collapse.
I sighed with relief that he was there, that I could see his beautiful face in the morning again. The face of the man who during these past years had been one of the main reasons why life in San Jose had become more bearable.
It didn't matter if I had a hard day at work or if I got a call from my parents criticizing my decisions a thousand times, it calmed me down to come home and find Shaun waiting for dinner. Or make dinner knowing that in a few minutes he would arrive. We were never in a hurry to finish eating because we used to talk a lot, I would listen to him talking about the shifts, the patients and the relationship with his coworkers. And he would listen to me complain about my former bosses. We could talk about everything, without reservations. We were always confidants. Those moments were a tradition of our routine, the best part of it, something unique to us.
For a while I didn't understand why it made me happy to wake up and know that I would see the image of Shaun in the kitchen, peeling green apples thoroughly. It took a while and a few situations for me to understand that I loved him, but as soon as I realized this I assumed the posture of a selfless, sisterly friend and since that discovery it was hard to disguise looking at him with all the ecstasy his presence provoked in me.
The possibility of falling in love with Shaun had existed since we first met, and upon analyzing his attitudes after my return from Hershey I considered that the probability existed for him as well. That's why I hesitated long before agreeing to share the apartment; I couldn't risk our friendly relationship by putting other feelings at stake. I am good at ruining things, and I didn't want to do that with Shaun, I preferred to work on the idea that all I needed was his friendship.
After the night of the earthquake I harshly realized that going over my feelings might have been the worst move I would have made in my life. And this time, I took the risk of not having any chance to make it right.