Feels like summer|| Mid90s one shot book🌤

Lost in time

(Swipe to listen along while reading
Song: Lost in time- Ski mask the slump god
Read A/N at end pls)
TW: Talk of suicide and suicide attempts🖤

The stars shined brighter than usual tonight. Below the bridge, a large ocean calmed down becoming silent.

'This is the life'
Willow sighed to herself deep in her thoughts.

How could life become so disappointing despite all of her accomplishments? She passed all of her classes, had a good heart, positive attitude towards others, and never tried putting herself first.

"I have nobody..." Willow announced to herself.

Staring at the cellphone in front of her, showed no new messages despite trying to reach out to her "friends". The dry responses to Willow finally opening up made her feel pathetic and violated somehow. She cared so much for her friends mental health but when it was time to discuss her own, nobody showed up.

"I'm so fucking alone!"

Tears began to stream down her face with no sign of stopping. She didn't understand.

"Why does nobody fucking care!" Willow screamed loudly, just leaving an echo.

Deep inside she knew she was scared of the idea of death but she knew it was the only option. Looking down at the water, she thought about all of the good memories she thought her friends gave her. How could they just take her in and end up getting mad over their mistakes?

After this friendship failing like the others, Willow knew that she was unloveable. Just like her mother told her a long time ago.

"You'll always be unloveable Willow. Nobody will ever love you, not even yourself. Youre fucking pathetic. They're only hanging out with you out of pity!"

Why didn't she just believe her mother and ended her life then?

"Willow!"

The voices shouting drowned out in the girls mind. The dark cloud that hung over her head was surrounded with nothing but smoke from one of many blunts she smoked to feel painless.

"Willow! What are you doing!"

"Ray?" Willow answered softly, not moving from the edge of the bridge.

"Cmon Willow...we're here for you..." Ray spoke.

After finding one of many notes in her empty household, the boy grabbed Fuckshit and searched all over town.

"Where the fuck is she!?"

"Calm down...We're gonna find her-"

"And if we dont! She's going to do something- I know it- I- DID YOU NOT SEE THE LETTER FUCKSHIT?" Ray screamed in the passenger seat.

"You're just going to leave me...I know it..." Willow looked down at her feet.

"Baby, I promise- I swear on my fucking life-" Ray started.

"No...that's what they said...I don't understand...I don't understand...I didnt do anything wrong..." Willow stammered.

Ray and Fuckshit panicked, watching Willow stutter over her words and tears. No matter how loud they yelled, Willow would just stare off and continue asking what she did wrong.

"Nobody cares...Nobody cares..."

Fuckshit began to move slowly towards Willow, not wanting to scare her or cause even more panic. While they weren't as close as her and Ray, Fuckshit still cared for her as if that was his younger sister.

"I gotchu Willow...I gotchu..." Fuckshit whispered as he grabbed Willow and wrapped her legs around him quickly before she could run out of his grip.

"Nobody fucking cares! Nobody wants me here!" Willow sobbed loudly.

The two teens comforted their friend, trying to keep her far away from the edge of the bridge.

"I just want it to be over..." Willow continued to sob.

Ray ran his hands through her hair as he continued to hold her.

"I love you Willow...We all do, okay? I fucking love you like a brother, you can come stay with me for how long you need to okay? I fucking love
you." Fuckshit told her, tears running down his cheeks.

"We both do, we love you for you. We love you for everything, I love you. I love you so much Willow and know that life wouldn't be the same
without you okay? I love you so much." Ray expressed, hugging onto her tightly.

"I'm so sorry for this, Im so sorry." Willow told, staring at them with nothing but sadness in her eyes.

"Let's go home, okay? We can have a sleepover at Fuckshit's and stay up and talk about anything you want, okay? For how long you need to, okay?" Ray told Willow the plan.

Willow nodded sadly, laying her shoulder on his.

Despite feeling so alone, Willow had felt like Ray and Fuckshit was her keepers and soulmates.

"Guys?" Willow asked softly.

"Yeah?" They both answered.

"I love you guys.."

"We love you too, Willow. More than you could even know."

A/N:
Heyyy... Its been a while so hey? I guess this is just a random one shot of how life has been going recently. Also ima senior now n the last time i posted i was a sophomore :'). But i just hope everyone is okay and just know that everything is
going to get better please, even if you don't believe it. My mental health isnt the greatest and i just wanted to write about it so i guess here it is. Ive recently lost an old classmate to suicide so im just trying my hardest to keep hanging on mentally. but please know that i care even if im 100 miles away. just know that we're both in this together and if you even want my instagram to talk just give me a dm to ask for it if you're in need. Remember that life gets better and the days get brighter. Thank you for reading and maybe ill make a comeback soon if i get requests (?). Thank you.
-Mani🤍