After that little episode with the sunset, I have turn myself back into that lonely girl that is constantly sitting, watching the fire flicker on and off. I just can't get myself to go anywhere outside of my house. It's a horrible state to be stuck in.
My friend, Finnik Odair, once told me, "it takes 10 times longer to put yourself back together than it dose to fall apart". That is what I am living by at the moment. If I don't bring back anymore more bad memories, I won't have to put myself back together.
The fire go's totally out. For a few minuts I debate on getting up. Finally, I get up form my chair to light the fire. Suddenly, as if on cue, Greasy sae runs out of the kitchen to light it for me.
"It's okay dear I've got it" I don't know why she dose that. I could get it myself. I'm not totally brocken. Or maybe I am.
"I could have got it." I say to her when she gets up form the fire place.
"Never mind dear. I know your going through a tough time." She protests' What dose she mean tough time? I guess I've been acting depressed, but it's nothing new to her or to me.
"Do I look that depressed?" I say, a hint of anger in my voice.
"Well Peeta's back in town, isn't he? I thought you would feel some kind of hurt." She says also with a hint of anger.
Peeta. In town. The same town I'm in. No. Now it will take 30 times longer to put myself back together.
I run from the house. Out the back door. I don't care if people stair now. I'm in to much pain. I hear greasy sae's voice calling after me, but I don't stop. I run all the way to the seam. I run past the old site of my house, now a pile of rubble. I take the only safe path I know to the pond. It takes a few minutes to get there. When I enter the clearing of the pond, I instinctively head straight inside the small cabin I used to play house in when I was little. It needs cleaning but it will do for now. All I need is a safe place to sleep away form everything and everyone that could hurt me. As the hours pass I slowly fall into a deep sleep.
I'm back in 13. In the hospital department. What could I be doing in here? Maybe looking for prim? I hope not, I won't find her anywhere anymore. I continue on deeper into the hospital looking for something unknown. There's what I was looking for, Johanna. She is hucked up to so may machines, heart rate, blood pressure, and a liquid bag. All her hair is shaved off showing a very purple bruise scalp, also she is extremely skinny. The one part of the v neck hospital shirt she is wereing shows nothing but skin and bons, it's a terrible sight. Now it comes to me. This is were I go see Peeta and he strangles me until my neck is severely bruised. I can't let that happen again. I try to run out of the hospital but Peeta, not Haymitch not gale not my mother, Peeta stops me in my tracks with a hug. His arms are as strong as I remember them, tightly imbracing my now limp body. I pass out.
I wake with a very disturbing spark of energy. I look around the very small, but warm, cabin. This also brings back memories. I shiver slightly.
I decided to head back to my house. That's the easy part. Now I have to decide how to avoid as much of district 12 as possible. I don't want anyone to see me, especially Peeta. I don't know in witch part of town he is staying in so I decide to go around 12 completely using the tree line.
I pass the old spot in the fence where me and gale used to use to go hunting, I pass the old site of the hob that is now being rebuilt, and finally the one place were Peeta would most likely be, the new bakery.
The bakery is not exactly on the edge of the towns border, but is a few buildings away. I take a chance, and leaving the safety of the forest. I dart towards the back for the bakery. My curiosity overwhelming me. I break a sweat.
When I reach my destination, I pere inside a small window. Bread, ovens, busy employees, that's it. I guess I was hoping to see Peeta, but now that I come to my senses, I don't. What am I doing here? The question startles me. What AM I doing here? I start back to the forest, still the question buzzing in my head. I get back to my house unnoticed. All my thoughts are jumbled. I open the front door and head straight for my room, not bothering to say hello to Greasy Sae. I sit in my bed for awhile, puzzling and puzzling. Was it my curiosity? My nerve? Adrenaline? Or maybe I wanted to see Peeta.. I never thought about that until now. I do need him
I need Peeta.
I decide to find him tomorrow.
YOU ARE READING
Everlark • the perfect ever after
FanficHi! This is my first time on wattpad so bare with me.. This is a hunger games trilogy fan fiction. After finishing Mockingjay, I wanted to know more about life in district 12. That is when I discovered wattpad. Here I could read and create life afte...