Bad Days

If You Could Find A Reason To Stay

AN: read while listening to Cigarette Daydreams by Cage the Elephant! The music video attached has a long intro so just skip to the song before reading <3

The opening instrumentals began to play.

"Oh, I know this song," Naomi said.

Declan climbed onto the centre of the bed and leaned against his headboard. He stretched a leg out and folded his other one up, then tilted his head back and took in the song, hoping Naomi would do the same.

Did you stand there all alone?
Oh I cannot explain what's going down

Naomi, sitting at the foot of his bed, flopped backwards onto it and stared at the ceiling. Declan watched her from where he was sitting.

You sigh, look away
I can see it clear as day

Close your eyes, so afraid
Hide behind that baby face

Naomi let out a slow breath. Declan watched her expression, hard and stubborn as rock even though she'd been pleasant with him this entire time. He knew that in her shoes, he would never have been able to keep it together the way she did.

Declan picked up a pillow and hugged it, resting his chin on it and closing his eyes.

You wanna find peace of mind

Declan opened his eyes again to look at Naomi.

Looking for the answer

Her hair was splayed out around her head, her glasses halfway down her nose. Her eyes were a little less blocked off now, sadness peeking through behind them. Declan figured this was a sign that she was taking his advice of letting the music do the work for her.

He tossed his pillow over to her. She clutched it to her chest and swallowed, eyes still stuck to the roof. She shifted a shoulder and fidgeted with the fabric of the pillow. Declan could see Naomi's resolve crumbling.

Cigarette daydream

"You were only seventeen," She whispered.

Soft speak with a mean streak
Nearly brought me to my knees,

Declan couldn't help but feel like he was intruding on her with his presence. He could hear the hurt in her voice. The result of years with nothing to look forward to except escape. He hoped the music would help her acknowledge that feeling. He didn't want her to have to relive the bad parts, but if it was a part of her process he didn't want to stop it. Her brows, once furrowed, relaxed.

You wanna find peace of mind
Looking for the answer

Declan wrenched his eyes away. These were vulnerable moments. He wanted keep an eye on her to make sure she was feeling okay, but something told him Naomi wouldn't have wanted to be watched.

"If you could find a reason, a reason to stay," Her voice softly sounded again, cracking a little. Declan glanced at her.

Standing in the pouring rain

Declan sat up. Her eyes shined. And as something dripped down her cheek, Declan realised with a start that they were shining with tears.

"Naomi-"

Naomi twisted her head back and looked at him, an action so direct and open that he had to freeze. He felt like she was looking straight into his soul. He was exposed under her arrow of a gaze, watery as it was.

Oh, the things he was willing to give in order to catch a glimpse of what she was thinking about.

Naomi cast her eyes downwards. Declan could see her eyelashes fluttering. He would say something if he didn't feel completely immobilised.

You wanna find peace of mind

"Looking for the answer," She sang louder, her lips lifting to her small Naomi smile.

If we could find a reason, a reason to change

Naomi sat up, combing a hand through her hair.

Looking for the answer

Declan moved over, leaving space for her and patted the area next to him.

If you could find a reason, a reason to stay

Naomi moved to sit right next to him leaning against the headboard, his pillow on her lap.

Standing in the pouring rain

She rested her head on his shoulder.

---

AN:

hey guys! i know its hard to comment and read songfics at the same time so comment your thoughts here! I live for comments and reader interaction if you can't tell already

(i always read songfics with the music at least twice, first time to get a feel of the immediate mood and timing, and second time  to understand the fic on a deeper level now that i know how fast or slow it has to be read and to go back on anything i mightve missed. im totally not saying this to encourage you to read back and add more comments though. shut up.)

im actually not sure how long i want to continue this fic, i figured it would be long enough for 2 parts, but i already have plans for a part 3, so let's see how far this goes, and if youre planning on staying here, thank you

im writing this with my biology class in the background on zoom lol we're learning about cheese