When Marriage becomes a mistake

Sara Shams Udin belongs to a middle-class family in Pakistan. In her family, she is the youngest. Sara is a bright, vibrant and, the active girl that deals with everything with courage and a smile. Her lively kind nature is her strength and the most adored trait. One year changed her life completely. If I say how a year changed her world? It would be correct. The year 2020 proved to be a nightmare in the majority of people's life. Many people's life changes drastically. Many suffered the loss of their loved ones. Some are troubled by the financial and mental crisis. Life is the worst for Sara if that one person hasn't entered her life.

The life in quarantine was like a turtle speed phase. Everything just took a pause. All the People stay at home as a result of social distancing and lockdown. Out of country Pakistani were back home for the period. Asfan was also back home for this quarantine period. He was a salesperson in Germany. When he was in Pakistan, his family decided to find a bride for him. So he can get settled in life. Also, this time when he goes back wife can accompany him to Germany.

Sara was an independent woman, working in a designing company as a project head manager. She was well-settled in life. Her parents were worried about her marriage. Her mother used to tell everyone to find her daughter a perfect match for her daughter. So nearby ladies once in a while shared the various proposal with her. They were not satisfied. One day Sakina, the maid, told her about the neighbours that live in the other street from her home. His son is back from Germany. They were in search of a bride. Since they were also finding a groom so why not they both meet?

She repeats the same story to his family. Both the family decided to meet. Slowly things got settled. Sara and Asfan got married. Her family did not take much time because his family was well known and respectable in the area. Also, Asfan was well settled in Germany and earned a wealthy lifestyle. So it was a perfect match for her family. Sara also accepted the proposal as she trusted their decision.

They welcome Sara into the family wholeheartedly. Sara's in-laws were good with her. New life was treating her good as she was happy with the marriage. The lockdown lifted so, Asfan has to return to his work. He booked his ticket and left for Germany. Soon he called Sara to Germany. She liked the new place and environment. A few months later, she caught Asfan red-handed with a cigarette and a wine bottle. He was in denial that it's not his. The bottle and the cigarette belong to his friend. He puts up a fight, slapped her in the face. She was shocked for a while by what just happened. later on, she figured out he was drunk. In the morning, he apologized for his abusive actions. But things never get sorted. Once in a while, he would come home drunk and start bashing at her. Sometimes he would beat her so worst. He also makes sure that Sara doesn't tell about his drinking habit and excessive smoking to relatives.

One day Asfan was home while Sara was out with her neighbour friend. He waited for a while as anger took the best of him. He prepared a drink for himself and continue his march throughout the hallway. She was still not home. He took his belt and had a good grip on it. It was clear what was next to happen. But it was a lucky day for Sara, as she was not home yet. Soon he dozed off while waiting. Sara entered home with grocery bags. She saw Asfan lying on the couch, bottles lying here and there, also the belt in his hand. Sara gulped her saliva as a shiver ran down her spine. She entered her bedroom and locked the room. She was shivering hysterically. Also, tears started flowing on her face. She knew if she didn't escape today, she might end up dead. She rushed to her wardrobe pack the necessary things, book urgent tickets. Next, she called her friend to take her to Airport. A meanwhile, she offered prayer and cried her heart out. Her friend informed her when she was at her doorstep. She left her drunk, sleepy husband on the couch, rushed to her friend's car. She landed in Pakistan after a long tiring journey. She had suffered emotionally. One year of torture was enough for her soft soul to bear the pain. On the doorstep of her home, she fainted.

Her parents were shocked at her physical state. She never told her family what she had faced in the last year neither did her in-laws know anything. She suffered all alone. Medical reports confirmed her kidneys are badly affected. Some of the bruises were so worst. Internally infected many of her delicate organs. The doctor was suspicious of her having any infectious disease. Her immune system was failing. After a week of unconsciousness, she was so weak to even talk about what happened to her. Rumours were revolving in the family that she got divorced. From her in-law's side, the stories were, she ran away from her home, leaving her home and husband. Some people target her character. Some people framed her to be the reason behind her unsuccessful marriage. Sara was able to speak for herself told her parents that she wanted a divorce. She was headstrong that she doesn't want to live with that abusive person anymore. Her parents supported her while all her relatives were against her decision. They blame her for this failure of a marriage. Society believes, if a marriage doesn't work, it's always the girl's fault. They fail to acknowledge the other factors.

Later on, the medical reports confirm some Aids viruses in her body. She was still in the hospital as her previous wounds and scars were healing. Society left her family alone in this struggle. Instead, They questioned her character. After the diagnosis, they couldn't share with anyone. Aids is still taboo. She cries for hours. It's something that becomes a part of her daily life.

On social media, it has become a daily headline. Justice for girls who suffered from abuse, assault, or murder. women, once get married shall leave that home once she's dead. If she asks for a divorce, she's not a good woman. These societies created norms are damaging society. A few days later, Asfan had a live session with his followers. He was smoking throughout the session. He further blamed her by calling her out as a headache. People in the comment sections were asking, "Do you leave her? or did she ask for a divorce?"

For people, all that matters are the daily spicy gossips. They don't care the things they are talking about casually concerns someones' life. His video further broke Sara. She felt so torn off, abandoned and alone. Why every pressure and question was for her to answer? Why does no one blame him? This thought crossed her mind a lot. Her parents were also worried about her as her marriage ended in a mess. Now with all these rumours and medical conditions, who will ever marry her?

She opted for her therapy. In all this mess, she needed her emotional strength back. With every session, she felt a little better. She prayed and, she cried. She doesn't give up. After some time, she was getting back to normal. She gained her strength back. Once she was in the right state, she decided to share her story with the people. She used her social media platforms. People listen to the whole story, support her. Some still even doubt her, again not everyone can understand. She opened up about her toxic, abusive husband. She shared some pictures. Also, her emphasis was that parents should not let their daughters stay in an abusive relationship. Being divorced is better than surviving an abusive relationship or ending up dead.