Gaon didn't go to work the next day. Nobody would find it strange, it was Sunday after all, but this was Kim Gaon in question. He has gone to work every single day for the past four months without exception.
His secretary, Ah Yeon Ja, disregarded it as her superior finally taking a much-needed break.
And it was true, Gaon was really taking a break in a sense. The moment he woke up, his body slid down to the cold, wooden floor, and didn't get up for hours. He just sat there on the ground with his back leaning against the bed and let the time pass. The entire morning flew in a blink of an eye without Gaon moving an inch.
His lifeless stare was fixed on the wall in front of him.
The urge to use the bathroom won over Gaon's unwillingness to get up around 2pm. With a heavy sigh, he scrambled to his feet, stumbling multiple times in the process. His legs were numb after sitting for so long and didn't want to listen to him. It took Gaon a great amount of effort to reach the bathroom but somehow, he managed to do so.
When he was washing his hands, Gaon caught a glance of his reflection in the mirror. What he saw was a poor version of someone named Kim Gaon. Someone, who only resembled him, because the real Kim Gaon didn't have bloodshed eyes, dark circles, boney cheeks nor looked like his last day was approaching. No, this wasn't 'the' Judge Kim anymore, not the one who fought for justice by Kang Yohan's side and attended Live Court. What stared back at Gaon was just an empty shell.
Tears swelled up in his eyes, overflowing almost instantly. His knees buckled and crashed against the bathroom tiles the next moment. Gaon was on the ground again, his limbs and lower body completely relaxed. The last muscles that didn't give up completely were the ones on his back, causing Gaon to be in a sitting position and not lying down. Still, it didn't take long before Gaon's face made an impact with the cold tiles.
Even if he wanted to get up, the younger judge simply couldn't. His body wasn't even relaxed anymore – lifeless was more accurate. No energy, no will, no strength was left in him. All Gaon could do was lie there on the floor and cry silently. Tears just flowed out of his eyes, making his vision blurry.
His head was empty. Kim Gaon knew the feelings he desperately wished to bury inside, to run away from, to escape... got him. It's wasn't dark anymore, it was pitch black. Unbearable numbness. No thoughts, it was too tiresome to think. As if the time stopped from the moment he heard how the Kangs were doing.
They were happy, at last. Gaon wished for nothing more, nothing... except the fact that he could be part of the picture as well. They started a new life while Gaon managed to ruin his. They were successful and worked towards their goals while Gaon overworked himself every day without any aim. They had each other while Gaon was left alone. Abandoned.
He deserved it, all of this. The younger judge knew it, he knew it better than anything else. And yet he still wished, deep down, that it was the three of them living in Switzerland. That he would not be left behind.
Gaon hated himself for this selfishness. His selfish desires and foolish decisions got him where he was now. In the end, he didn't believe Kang Yohan to the last moment and despite having every reason to not betray him, he did. Gaon didn't pick Yohan so he had no right to expect anything else than the same treatment. Gaon could not blame anyone else but himself.
Upon blinking a few times in an attempt to focus his vision again, Gaon's gaze fell on one of his bandaged wrists. It was all soaked with fresh blood, his wounds must have opened up at some point.
At that moment, Gaon knew.
This was it.
His plants were about to have a hard time.
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FanfictionThe Devil Judge series: Kim Gaon x Kang Yohan. I originally posted this story on ao3 but then decided why not here as well. There are literally like 5 fanfics on Wattpad regarding the Devil Judge Kdrama, there will be 6 now hahaha. --- Kim Gaon is...