"𝐻𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝐼 𝑎𝑚 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛, 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎 𝑗𝑢𝑑𝑖𝑐𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝑠𝑝𝑖𝑡𝑒" I honeyed the word, depressingly.
The weather is so harsh yet I'm thankful. It's allowing me to be alone. And within it's fastidious wind that slaps my blaspheme skin, it makes me bleed and keep my blood easily dry.
I'm so worn-out about my life as if it was a hoax ho-hum. Pinaghahampas ko nalang lahat ng bagay na madaanan ko.
Mostly, I spat all my disgust into the leaves. How ironic, my life was prudent to assume the worst.
"Baliw ka na ba?!" The voice in my dream entered my ears and echoed in my mind. It felt so real to the point that I burst into suppressed laughter but then I immediately stopped.
Sino ba namang nilalang ang magkukumahog para sabihan lang ako noon diba?
Whatever, let me set aside that scheme. I must focus on my own death case.
'How and in what way should I die again?' Iyon ang paulit ulit kong ginagawa araw araw. Ang mabuhay para mamatay. I take names in vain and spend no rest at that Motel.
The old fart says, I can escape that duty if I kill myself enough. Pero wala eh, ilang beses ko pa bang papatayin ang sarili ko, para lang mamatay ako?
"Miss! Shelter yourself. Mamamatay ka sa ginagawa mo, eh!" the voice in my dream, shouted again. It was loud and clear as if he's near. As if he's true...
Sinalubong ko ulit ang rumaragasang hangin kasama ng iba't ibang bagay na tinatangay nito. Ramdam na ramdam ko rin kung paano ito lumalagak sa katawan at pumupunit sa balat ko. Wala akong nagawa kundi pilit na namnamin nalang ang hapdi hangang sa hindi ko na kayang tangapin pa ang hagupit nito.
"Miss, please. Shelter yourself" I heard him again as I closed my eyes. After that voice hugged me like it had his own sense. I opened my eyes.
DOES HE REALLY EXIST?
I stopped alluringly and controlled the grim weather finely. Unti- unting umaliwalas ang paligid, kasabay nito ang paglisan ng kanina'y nagbabadyang kalamidad.
Tinitigan ko lang siya habang bakas sa mga mata niya ang pagtataka sa mabilis na pag amo ng panahon. I wanted to stroke his porous brows and gaze into his lovely dark eyes.
What was that?
"You, please! I know life is hard but depression can be prevented!" he uttered.
I listened as deep as shit, but I was still confused with his empty plea.
He obtains a lot of things wrong. BIG TIME!
"LEAVE." I think I said the word so hard that I forgot to hide my disappointment.
Whatever, feed his brain first. "I'm not a suicidal even though I kill myself hundred times... gradually, I'm no." I said once again before I started to make the situation even worse.
"Depression without any suicidal thoughts is still a cruel depression." he said and began to follow my lead. "Happiness..." The word he said, made me stop and let the silence answer the strange conversation we had.
"Happiness can make it's progress." He blocked my path and grin horribly which made the veins in my head even angrier.
The air brush for lightning as he simpers. I'm not into fun,now. I FEEL ANTAGONIZED!
"You won't leave? Okay fine." nababanas kong sabi sabay talikod...
And viola! With my raging mood, I pointed a gun through my fuming head.
YOU ARE READING
Motel Blue Moan
FanfictionEXCELSA EDITION Leapin' lizards! Basically, the tale started when you have to sex more frequently... ...Nevertheless, what will happen if you can't get out of that exact Motel? And the only thing you can do is to surrender your body in order to esca...
