October 10th

428 17 10
                                    

Bad Romance - Lady Gaga

"You're sure you are ready?" He asks worried.

"I'm fine Tony" I say as I get my bag.
I had 5 surgeries 2 days ago, and even though I promised I'll take it easy, Tony is still unsure.

"Take care... and CALL! Or I will hunt you down" Nat says in a very empathetic voice...

"I will" I say with a smile.
She carefully leans in for a hug, she pushes a little too hard and I squeak out.

"I'm sorry" She says and flinches away as she grabs my shoulders.

"It's ok" I say, pulling myself together.
I put my bag over my shoulder and prepare to lay it in the cab.

"Let me help you... please" Tony says and takes my bag.

"I'm fine Tony" I chuckle as I find it cute how much he wants to take care of me.
He places the bags in my cab and I go to get the last hugs.

I get one from Bucky, one from Bruce, one from Wanda and lastly one from Sam. They are all so gentle.

I see Steve in the distance. I feel a push in my stomach. A push that says I need to go and talk to him. So I debate it in my head, and I walk over to him.

"Hi" I nervously say.

"Hi" He says back, completely uninterested in me.

Ok I deserved that one...

We kinda just stand there for a little. I knit my fingers as I plan a whole speech in my head.

"I'm sorry... for everything" I say slowly, just wanting to get this over with.
He looks out, thinking of something.

"Steve?" I say, trying to catch his attention again.
He looks over to me and it looks like he's holding something back.

"What?" He says with a calm and innocent voice, like he is holding back tears.
He bites his lips like someone does when they don't want to break.

"Talk to me" I say, feeling a lot of guilt passing through me.

"Can I?" He says with a little anger.

"I'm sorry Steve... I was a dick who decided to call it off like that... but it was 5 years ago... can we please move on" I say with desperation.

He goes quiet and looks down while I stare at him with desperate eyes.
Then he looks up again after taking a breath.

"Why couldn't you wait 4 days?" He says with shiny and sad eyes.

I really don't want to tell him as it'll dump even more on him. He's a sensitive guy... he doesn't get over things easily.

But he is a grown man... and he wants to hear the truth.
So it's now or never...

"I snapped... ok... something inside me snapped... I couldn't stay here anymore" I say, remembering the feeling.

"It was 4 days..." He says while switching on his feet and it looks like his heart is aching.

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