tumblr || rudy pankow

2.1

Rudy glanced over to the other couch in the living room, one leg tucked underneath him. It was still early, about seven thirty, but he'd been awake since five, when his daughter had started fussing. In an attempt to let his girlfriend sleep a little while longer, he'd picked up the seven week old and trudged upstairs to get the bottle that Beau had pumped the night before. His dad, not used to having time off, was already awake and swooped in as soon as Rudy had finished feeding her, taking her to the living room to have some "Papaw Time" with her. It gave Rudy time to prepare breakfast, Beaus favorite biscuit scramble thing that her mom made all the time, and while it had to cook for an hour in the oven, he went to sit with his dad.

"You got her for a few minutes? I'm gonna go wake Beau up. If I don't she's gonna yell at me that her boobs hurt because she's usually pumped by now." He questioned, shaking his head at himself. A year ago, Rudy wouldn't have been openly talking about the state of his girlfriend's boobs, but the last seven weeks had changed that. He knew more about lactation than he ever thought he should really know, including that it felt like her boobs were rocks if she didn't stick to her pumping schedule. Ellie, at six weeks old, had decided that she was tired of nursing, which saddened Beau, because she wanted to do it as long as possible. Then she'd realized she could exclusively pump for their daughter and that meant that Rudy could get up in the middle of the night to help with feedings.

He'd felt like an idiot, standing in the aisle at Walmart with the bottles trying to pick one's that would work, thankful when some mom offered him help.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude. You look like you're struggling to make a decision" the woman's voice was at a level that it wouldn't embarrass him, and he looked over at her sheepishly.

"Yeah, uh, my girlfriend has been exclusively breastfeeding for six weeks, unfortunately our daughter has decided that is apparently too much work for her. She's gonna start exclusively pumping for her, but I have no idea what bottles get for her." he said. "I just took the baby and came here, needed some more essentials anyway."

"Well you're in luck, because I nursed for ten weeks before my son gave up. These ones are the best for babies that started off breastfed. They have a slower flow than a normal bottle." She handed him a pack of three bottles with a smile. "She's a cute one, Pankow. You're a lucky Dad."

"Thanks. I feel pretty lucky. Even if she doesn't sleep." He said. "Now, do you know me from around here or because of my work." The tone was joking, but even if she did know him from his acting, it was nice to be treated like a normal person.

"Oh no, my little sister graduated with you. Aleah Kincaid. She tutored you in Spanish." She told him. "I'm the oldest of us five, I was already married and out of the house before that, though. I'm Emily"

"It's weird to talk about her in past tense." He sighed. Aleah had actually been his high school girlfriend and they broke up amicably when he moved to LA. "I- She was so close to beating it, Emily. I was so sure she was going to beat it."

"We all were, Rudy. That's why I came back, to help her out. It was an aggressive cancer, they couldn't even tell her her prognosis when they found it. She put up a hell of a fight though, she wanted to see your show come out." She said. "And she did, you know. She was so proud of you, she only got a couple of episodes watched before she passed, but she was so proud. Told all of her nurses that you were her best friend in high school."

"I loved her, Em, you know? If you can be in love at seventeen. If I wouldn't have moved to California, I'd have married her. It was amicable but it was still our first big break up." He said. "We didn't even really tell anyone we were dating, it felt a lot like what I have with Beau. I think that's why it took me so long to finally ask Beau to be my girlfriend."