BHNA X reader ONESHOTS

Dear my Izuku (Finale probably)

I stood in front of the memorial staring blankly at the opened letter. Of course it could be someone else, someone sickly curious as to what the widow of the number 1 hero had to say. But I knew that it wasn't the case. I clenched my teeth and moved the paper to the side, resigning to sitting at the base of his statue. It was made in his likeness by the government to honor his sacrifice but if I am being honest, it looks nothing like him. This deku stands strong with a confident expression though everyone who knew you would say it didn't fit you at all. Determined you are but confident? You never were that, no matter how hard I tried to engrain it into you.

I reached over to the side and pulled a bottle of wine out of a leather bag popping open the top and pouring two glasses and setting one off to the side. I swung my feet in a rhythmic motion and leaned my head against the marble's feet staring into the sky.

"Happy anniversary Izuku" I said with a large smile tilting the glass up to the sky in cheers. "Our little girl set a kid on fire yesterday..." I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "Katsuki was so proud you would think he was the father" I laughed "You should've heard him "That little shit deserved it, trying to pull (K/N)'s hair" I mocked Kat's voice making it uncharacteristically gruff. I sighed, taking a sip of the alcohol and swishing the blood colored liquid in the glass. "She is really powerful, honestly sometimes it scares me, she has the perfect blend of quirks...I... I don't know what to do" I stuttered, feeling my eyes water. "God, I would give anything to see you again, I have become such a mess, everyone is saying that I am starting to act more like you!" I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "I know you can hear me, whether you are hiding in the shadows or seeing me from someplace else. Everyone keeps saying that I need to come to reality. But frankly speaking, I dont give a single fuck" I laughed, it wasnt humorous, it felt more like the final cry of someone who mentally snapped. "Even if what I feel is a delusion, I will never let it go. Ever. If you think somewhere in your chemically altered brain Izuku that I will be happier if you kept your distance, you are wrong. I will never remarry, I will never love again. I promise you that" I grit my teeth. "So you might as well show yourself to me, right here right now. There is nobody here so why not? What am I going to do, tell someone? Everyone thinks I've gone crazy! Of course they wouldn't say that to my face."

I sat there for what felt like years silently praying that he would show himself to me again. Just one more time. Finally I gave up when the sun started to set and hopped off the pedestal, my feet lightly falling onto the ground with trained elegance. I turned and packed up everything opting to leave the glass of red wine and bottle behind. I stretched my arms and looked around the area trying to find any sign of my supposed to be dead husband. I walked forward slowly dragging my feet, not wanting to leave. As I reached the arch of the small garden I felt a strong gust of wind from behind me. I crouched low to the ground and swung around making myself alert. However, I immediately stood back up at the sight in front of me. It was a hooded figure shrouded in dusk's rays.

"(Y/N)" The voice said, it was deeper than I remember, rough even. My eyes widened as he reached and pulled back the hood revealing my husband. His eyes were tired and a large scar ran across his face from his left eye to the right corner of his mouth. His hair was shorter than I remembered. Even though I imagined thousands of times what I would do in this situation all I could do was stand there in awe. There was no smile on his face, there was only regret and pain in his eyes.

"Ah, so I wasn't crazy" I said tilting my head with a smile "That's good, I was starting to get worried that I was sensing things" I took a small step forward carefully analysing the situation. I know that this man may be the one I love but right now I have to be careful. I am not an idiot, he has changed.

"I'm sorry" He said, looking lifelessly at the ground. I took multiple steps forward and met him where he stood taking in his face. I carefully raised my hand and brought it to his cheek, he reacted harshly, grabbing my wrist with extreme strength. I flinched in pain but didn't move.

"Don't be sorry my love, I knew that one day you would show yourself to me again" he slowly released my hand and I ran my fingers along his scar. "Dabi said that they did a number on you, but I didn't want to believe it" I whispered lightly brushing my thumb across his lips. I leaned in closer, catching myself into his gaze. "Dabi has always had a hate to tolerate relationship with me, but I knew that at least this one time he would tell me the truth" I was in awe at his changes, he didn't react the way he used to. His stuttering words or how he would blush so much his whole face would be red. He was colder, that much I know for certain.

"When did you meet Dabi?" he questioned, his eyes looking at me but seeming far away. I sighed and moved my hand to his pierced ears, it suited him. "I know that it wasn't recently"

"The last time I saw him was half a year ago, he would give me updates on you from time to time. I think it's because I saved his life that one time... He feels indebted to me I guess" I watched as his face contorted into confusion.

"You didn't tell anyone?" He asked hesitating before moving his hand up to my face grazing my cheek and pushing a strand of loose hair behind my ear. You know that they would've believed you in the end if you explained it."

"Because," I said, leaning in even closer so that our chests touched. "You didn't want to be found, so I let them believe I was clinging onto the memory of a dead man. Plus you and I both know that seeing you like this would destroy them" I sighed, leaning my forehead against his chest and breathing heavily. He even smells different.

"Why doesn't it destroy you?" He asked if I could feel his heartbeat quicken, even if his face doesn't, his heart will always betray him. "Seeing me like this, am I not hideous?" He continued moving my face to look him in the eye. I smiled warmly and moved up ruffling his hair.

"I could never find you hideous, even if you came at me drenched in acid I would still find you charming" I said. "Plus I always told you that I found men with scars hot, that includes faces"

"I can never go back (y/n)" He said, taking a small step away from me, trying to create distance. I sighed, putting my hands together and rubbing them, becoming increasingly aware of the cold weather.

"I know" I said looking at the ground "But for some reason I can't give up on you" I smiled feeling tears come to the corners of my eyes. I moved forward again, advancing on him slowly. He continued backing up til he was pressed at the base of his own likeness. I forced him to look into my eyes. "I am going to ask you a question, and depending on your answer I will leave Japan and go back home." I said straightening my back I reached up and grabbed his face pulling him towards me. "Is there any way to get you to return to us? Our daughter misses you even though she has never met you. I miss you, and love you, but I won't force you to return." I looked deep into his eyes, trying my best to convince him that I would be okay with any option he chooses. But I know that I will never be okay if he says no and I am forced to leave Japan with our daughter and never look back.

Minutes passed and I felt that there was nothing left, my heart felt crushed and my soul wavered. When I realized that there was no hope for us I moved to let him go. But as my palms left his face he gripped them and pulled me closer. It had been so long since I had felt his lips on mine and they felt so similar yet so different. I followed his lead and deepened the kiss desperation filling my lungs but I pressed on, afraid that once I let go he would leave and I would be alone again. Once we parted it took a moment for each of us to gather our breath and he leaned his forehead against mine.

"I am sorry, but I can never come back" He whispered a lone tear trailing down his face. I smiled softly knowing wiping the tear from his cheek.

"Okay, then i'll leave" I sighed "I-If you ever change your mind I will always welcome you back to me with open arms" I silently let go of him and stepped back grabbing the wine and glass from the base of his statue and bowing. "Goodbye my dear Izuku" I said before turning around and leaving, making it all the way home before breaking down.

"One day I will go back to you" Izuku whispered at his wifes retreating figure "but just not now, and not for a long time yet"  

(A/N thank you everyone for the support throughout this small oneshot series. The next chapter will be the first chapter of Strings Attached which could possibly be my Hawke's fan fiction)