If I overlook myself to feed another's ego, am I selfless or careless? Do I provide experiences as one's other or am I a self experiencing it with them? Do I recognize my selfworth in others or do they gift it to me?
The ordinary self loathing doesn't arm itself in pride and euphoria, having those narcissistic thoughts leaves a sour taste in my mouth...
Differentiating self love and narcissism seems a futile exercise that keeps its dichotomy alive and thriving. It allows me to recognize my ego. To not feel ashamed feeding it, nurturing it, giving it space and time to grow and develop.
Is it carelessness that fuels me or is it genuine need for human connection? Do i love myself or am I thrilled to see that someone else can love me too? Do I require their attention, their care, their proximity, their touch?
Is narcissism a result of self love?
Or is it inherently bound to the blindness that tends to overlook the ego of those who face me?
