Things have changed and so have I . When I was younger the world felt like a whole big wheel and I just couldn't wait to be in it and let it take me away but I see things differently now . At eighteen years of age so much has changed but my dad hasn't . But considering that am writing this in his house I wouldn't wish to speak such for I might be questioned of my actions later on I can never be sure . But as I speak I feel different these days like nothing can rescue me . I feel empty mostly because religion hasn't answered most of my questions and I got lost trying to find out who I am . But for all I know there's a God out there , I know this cause I have felt him not seen him , I have been weak and I have cried to him only cause no one else was there to listen only cause I was alone and I need to be heard or at least noticed and that is when I felt him I prayed and hoped he had listened . These days am torn between a lot as sometimes I pray sometimes I meditate . But the emptiness that feels me won't go away . Sometimes I ask myself if it's just me or the people . Cause sometimes I do think I deserve this am a terrible person and I know it it keeps me awake at night so does thoughts about my parents . For starters I live with my dad at the moment . But in hopes that am soon leaving to go see my mom . But when I was coming I was hoping that everything would change that he would change most importantly he had changed but that wasn't the case even after not being t
