Lords of Chaos (Ended)

The story of Dead before Mayhem

I am Pelle, but I prefer my stage name Dead. I am born on January 16, 1969, in Stockholm, Sweden where I also grew up. As a child and now suffer from sleep apnea and according to my own words I was constantly "on the threshold of death" because whenever I slept, no one could wake me up and I would "turn blue". I also said that I want to die I ever since I was 3 years old and to this day I want do die..

Later when I went to school, I became the victim of school bullying, because of my introverted and depressive tendencies. Unlike other children of my age, I was very shy, quiet and avoidant of any social interactions.
One time when I was 10, I was beaten so severely by my bullies that they ruptured my spleen and I had to be rushed to an emergency room where I was declared clinically dead for a few minutes. This near death experience haunted me for the remainder of my life:

Something amusing happened to me once I had internal bleeding until my heart had no more blood and my veins were nearly empty. Clinically speaking, I was dead. I saw everything in a strange blue color and for a moment everything was tinted with blue, then it turned white and something "warm" surrounded me. I later asked someone about these colors, a person who had a near-death experience and knew more about the "supernatural" than I did. He told me that I reached the first "level" of the other world, which has the color blue. The terrestrial level (where we live) has the color black. The next level between worlds is blue and the last level is white. No mortals can go there. If a mortal succeeds in reaching the white level then he stops being mortal and can't return to [our] world anymore. There are more levels/colors beyond the white one, but I don't know anything about them like only spirits and very powerful wizards can travel there. What I experienced was the white level, entering it without knowing. It was the realm of the dead, because I had actually died.
As a teenager, I developed a taste for heavy music - Black Sabbath, Iron Maiden, Motörhead, Sodom, Venom and Mercyful Fate. I eventually founded my own band which I named Morbid in 1986. A year later, after recording just one demo tape entitled December Moon, I decided to abandon the project because it was going nowhere damn.