REMINISCENCE

CHAPTER 33

SCARLETT

It's been 2 days since I broke down in front of Asher and the last time I saw him. I know it's a lot to take in but he just went missing like this?

It's not his mistake but I just spoke as if it was his. It really isn't , I was just pissed with him. The least he could do is call or let me know he is alive after I told him my deepest, darkest secret.

I've been under my covers for the past 2 days. My parents came and tried to get me out of bed and cheer me up but to no avail. I just wanted to sleep all day hoping what happened in the past week was just a nightmare.

It's all happening again , there is no contact between us but this time he is the one who left. I called his parents, Charlotte, Noah, Olivia. Ryder and I even went searching for him but we couldn't find him.

His parents are freaking out and Sophia is upset that her big brother is missing .Coach is furious over the fact that Asher didn't show up for practice because they have their match tomorrow. And this is all because of me.

This is not the way I imagined this would go. Yes I am angry with him that he wasn't there for me but now I am even angrier on myself for yelling at him as if it was his mistake. It's not his fault at all, it's Jake's and those assholes who touched me. Not his.

This incident happened 2 years ago and it took me a very long time to face and overcome it but I feel the same all over again. Digusted , rotten and above all I hate myself so fucking much.

Every minute I spent in California without Asher was hell. He was literally the only person who understood me , who was there for me and who really cared for me. People think I changed but honestly I didn't, I am still the girl who is madly in love with her best friend.

And I knew that Asher would feel alone all again because of me and that tore me apart. We were there for each other.

But I fucking left because I was scared. I can't feel any more pathetic. I should have stayed here, I should have stayed with Asher. Even though I was scared he would have been here. It's all my fault. I can't help but cry.

It's always him and I from the start but now I don't even think there's a him and I anymore.

I feel something wet on my hands and just to realize tears are streaming down my face yet again. And everytime I cry, it's always because of something I did to hurt Asher and that just makes me cry even more. I hug my pillow which was next to me and cry myself to sleep once again.

❦

The doorbell rings and I groan, it having woken me up from my sleep. It rings once again and I get out of bed. Where are my parents? I look over and see a small note on my bedside.

We have gone to the supermarket to buy some groceries and other things. It will take some time and by the time you wake up, if it's evening, there's some soup I made in the fridge. You can heat that up and eat. We will be back soon. Love you!

Mom

Ohh so that's why no one got the door. OH WAIT, THE DOOR! I mentally slap myself and rush down the stairs and open the door just to be taken aback at who's on the other side of it. Noah, What's he doing here?

"Hey, can I come in?" he asks in a polite tone and I usher him inside. "hey...what are you doing here?" I drag out and he chuckles.

"I actually came here to talk to you about Asher" he tells me and my eyes widen. "Did he get hurt? Is he okay?! Noah you can't just leave me hanging here!" I ask him, concern evident in my voice and he laughs again.