"Fears"

You scare yourself sometimes, being alone in your own thoughts, sitting there, still, with only the light wispy sounds of the metal pipes crackling and expanding in the cold dark basement where you hide. The monsters that have been sitting in place ready to pounce inside your brain then lunge into your eyes, never to be seen coming unless you were paying attention to their camouflage. Once their claws have dug in it's hard to stop them, they keep going even when you cry for help, for your thoughts have no mercy. You try to defend yourself, though you weren't prepared, for this was a surprise attack and you brought no help, no backup. You run and hide, you take things into your own hands though you have no strength for there have been too many battles and you're scared. Taken aback by how weak you've become you start to wonder if this is your fate. You let them tear you apart, limb from limb giving in. you have forgotten how to fight back. You tried so hard for so long and now you don't know what to do, how to save yourself or even what for. You keep trying. You go back and forth, you can hear every sound, every step. You're now shaking, trembling in fear, noticing your teeth are chattering and your hands are shaking, your entire body now vibrating uncontrollably. You are gone. You're done, you can feel the warm liquid leave your body, dripping along your skin and the light splatter as it hits the floor, the puddle forming, for they have broken you. You have broken yourself, now even more frightened you can't put yourself back together. Tired and alone, keeping everyone in arms reach for comfort from yourself. Hiding away all of your pain until you're alone. You can feel the need for someone to help, though you're so close yet so far from the help you deny you need. You feel your heart hit your stomach, almost as if a brick was dropped, the shattering sound of glass, the pieces ricocheting into your soul. You know it's over, you're sure. Scared that's all you have to offer the world, you drop to your knees. Look up at the ceiling, seeing the ripples in the wooden rafters wondering if that's the last thing you see, as you slowly close your eyes, you hear the water flow through the pipes one last time before you collapse onto the floor. You then open your eyes, sitting beside your loved one, you turn and look into their eyes, you see as they look through you, past your flesh and soul, as though you are a window, just slightly foggy. You blink, you're now alone once more, standing in front of the mirror. You can't see anyone other than the crippled self you see, trying to glue back from fraile pieces. You're no longer scared, just frozen in a blank universe holding onto the blank expression on your face and in your soul. Content in your depression for now.