DESTIEL SMUT!!!1!1!111

DESTIEL SMUT LOL

WARNING RLY NSFW AND SMUTTY COVER YOUR EYES AND HIDE YOUR CHILDREN

AU where Dean and Cas accidentally run into each other at Starbucks because Cas is obsessed with caffeine and Dean secretly runs a hipster-blog
Dean: Cas what the shit are you doing here
Cas: More like why are you wearing a crop-top and skinny jeans
Dean: ....
Cas: ....
Dean: Shut your ugly mouth and mind your own business you asscouch no one likes you and your D is probably small idk
Cas: Wanna find out 🌚?
Dean: 🌚
Cas: 🌚
Dean: 🌚
Cas: 🌚
*does the 🌚 in a toilet booth*
AIGHT THIS IS WHERE IT GETS DIRTY YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED
Cas: Omg Dean
Dean: Omg
Cas: *does stuff*
Dean: Omg Cas
Cas: Are you wearing a condom?
Dean: Cas we're both guys
Cas: Wait...
Dean: What's the matter?
Cas: But if guys can't get pregnant then why the frickle frick did I give birth to Sam's baby last month?
Dean: ...
Cas: ...
Sam (who's also here for some reason): LMAOOOO
LMAOOOOOOOOOO
OMG
DEAN
YOUR FACE
THAT FUCKIN FACE MAN
HOLY HAT
Dean: Wtf
Cas: Lol I did'nt even give birth to Sam's baby you dumbass
Dean: *leaves room*
Cas and Sam: *high fives eachother*

THE FUCKIN END

Edit: Oh god i hate myself for this please don't read this