Tainted Love || Jikook ff

❅ Prologue 2 : Why me? ❅

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The saddest and unacceptable part in life is saying goodbye to someone you wished to spend your lifetime with.

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It was yet another cold winter night. The clouds were covering up the dark night sky. The snow which has been falling down for days now, was covering up everything in a thick layer of snow which made the place look as if it's covered with a white blanket.

Fresh white snow falling from the sky hit my face as i walk through the bumpy road with lost steps. I stopped walking through the road as i look up to the sky and a bright light shines through my eyes. All of sudden i came back to reality, the flash of light was the street light. I didn't knew where I was walking to but I knew that I was stepping on the path which was covered with snow.

Looking around, I realised that I was walking through the market. I turn my head down as I can hear and watch how walking through the icy snow make crunch sounds beneath my feet. I wonder right now about how some hot cocoa would be a wonderful treat.

There was a lot hustle-bustle in the market since Christmas is coming and everyone
wanted to purchase gifts for their loved
ones and then there was me just walking past by them, chuckling as I feel the cold wind hit me.... making me realise the loneliness in me.

My steps came to halt and i stare
down at my shoes. I heaved a deep sigh
and look up to stare at the dark sky then down to my wallet which I just fished out of my pocket. I bite my lip as I see how I don't even have enough money to buy myself a dinner tonight.... and thinking about buying a gift, for whom should I buy it for?

I pocketed my wallet again as I felt the hot liquid leaking from my eyes. I immediately wipe it and pull my hood over my head as I hurried with my steps to go back to my recently shifted, new rental place. I have the last day in school tomorrow as after that the winter break will start and I can't afford catching cold by roaming around while the snow is falling. I need to stay all fit and fine to have a good last memory in my school since after finals, I will become a uni student. time flies so fast.

I entered inside my cheap small and a little bit dirty, rented place. I closed the door behind me as I hurriedly took off my shoes and ran towards the photo frame which lied down on the ground. I immediately pick it up and took a breathe in relief as I hug the photo frame after checking for any damage which might have been caused to it.

"thankfully it's safe" I breathe as I rubbed my thumb over the frame. I slowly felt my tear slide down my cheek...

"why did you left me? why can't you be here with me? why can't you come back to me? why you left me here alone all by myself to suffer and struggle to survive? why you had to be so cruel with me? why you had to leave me and make me feel the loneliness swallow me everyday? why me?" I choke on my sob as my tears couldn't stop flowing down and my grip just tightened around the photo frame.

I don't want anything but the happiness to return in my life. I just want him to come back to me but God has to be so cruel to me when I don't even know why it is me.

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