So my last 2 chapters gave you guys more information about Sutton and Zayn's relationship and more importantly details on what Zayn was going through, that to me was related to what Zayn was going through in real life. I kinda feel like I was foreshadowing in the book but, for it to only happen in reality, and the other difference is in the book he's not leaving One Direction anytime soon besides, the book takes place like back on their WWA tour, just the past lol.
So I haven't been updating much because I've been busy with school, a party I was hosting and then with what happened with Zayn last Wednesday. No, I'm not replacing him for somebody else to Sutton's girlfriend, lol, nobody could replace Zayn. Ever.
I hope everybody is doing fine and staying strong, I feel hurt as well but, we have to move forward, if this is what Zayn wanted then, okay. We have to respect his decision. This Zayn subject is a touchy one for me, maybe all of us, so just enjoy this chapter below:
Sutton's P.O.V.
"Thank you everyone. We love you guys, see you next time!" a booming voice echoed throughout the backstage area, indicating the show has ended and it was my time to make amends with Zayn. I took a deep breath and turned around to make my way to Zayn's dressing room, my feet hitting the cold hard floor every step I took.
I quickly slipped through the door as I heard a pair of footsteps coming near. I sprinted towards the crème colored couch and sat down. I fixed my black matte trench coat and ruffled my hair a little. As I frantically finished applying a bold color of red lipstick onto my lips, the door opened. I panicked and threw the tube of lipstick behind the couch before he noticed. Zayn was currently, closing the door and peeling off his sweat filled shirt. He hangs it up on a rack near the door, and as sensing my presence; he looks my way and immediately lets out a deep sigh.
I shot up from my seat, fiddling with my fingers, "I'm sorry Zayn."
"What are you doing here, Sutton?" He says, right after.
I took slow strides towards him, "I said I'm sorry, Zayn." I repeat.
I keep walking until I'm face to face with him; he looks down at me, then looks away, walking to his mirror and plopping down onto the seat across from his mirror. He covers his face with his hands, and then removes them, placing his hands in his lap.
"I heard you, Sutton, you can leave now."
I open my mouth in shock and walk over to him, standing in front of him. "Why?" I question, twirling a strand of my hair between my fingers.
He finally looks up at me and says, "Because I said so."
I roll my eyes, "Zayn, stop being like that. Do you forgive me?"
There was a long pause then, a sigh, "I don't know," he responds.
I drop my hand from twirling the strands of my hair and set my hands on my hips. "What do you mean, you don't know?" I ask.
"I just don't know, Sutton!" Zayn says, raising his voice.
I sniffle and look away for awhile then, look back at him, who had his eyes on me the whole time. "Why are you wearing a coat? It's not even cold." He finally says, eyeing me up and down.
I shrug, "Because I feel like it."
Zayn scoffs and fiddles with his raven locks. "Well I don't know what you want from me so, I can't help you." He says, closing his eyes.
"I could show you." I whisper. He hums, slumping in his seat, his eyes still closed while; I slowly untie the belt from around my waist. I feel the cool air on my bare stomach making me shiver a little. I took a deep breath and slowly climb on his lap, straddling him.
That got his attention because, his eyes shot open and he immediately sat up, causing me to sway to the side a little. I wrapped my arms around his neck, grinning. He lowly groans, and lazily sets his hands on my hips. "This is what's giving me seconds thoughts on us being together." He says, in a clipped tone.
My shoulders slump, "What?" I whisper. "What do you mean?"
"This!" He exclaims, pointing out my half nudity, that I thought would make him feel a little better. "You. Throwing yourself at me! I don't appreciate that, Sutton. Sometimes I'm not in the mood; sometimes I don't want you like that." He adds.
My heart drops at his words. I bite my tongue, preventing my tears to fall. I remove my hands from around his neck and quickly stand up. "Sorry." I whimpered and turned around, headed for the door while, frantically trying to retie the belt from around my waist, to hide what's over the coat.
I flung the door open and quickly slid out of the room. As I walked along the corridor, I wrapped the thin piece of fabric of my trench coat around my body tighter since I couldn't keep its belt around my waist. I wiped away the hot tears off my face and walked into the nearest bathroom and slammed the door shut behind me.
I slowly looked up into the mirror and faintly gasp at the sight of my face. My nose was slightly red, I had deep red blotches scattered all over my face, and my once bold red lips were a light red, slightly chapped. I had continuous tears streaming down my face and my eyes red. I stayed staring at my face for a couple of minutes until, I bursted into tears, my shoulders shaking. I thought about what he had said to me, what I had done. I just wanted him to notice me. I wanted him to love me like I love him. I wanted him to have the same feelings I did for him.
"Sometimes I don't want you like that."
