ONCE UPON A DIME I FLYNN CARSEN

Magic Versus The Mundane

Magic Versus The Mundane

"Lovers tiff?" Jenkins asked, raising an eyebrow as Jacob stalked back through the doorway, Clara following him, deliberately avoiding everyone's eyes.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Jacob muttered, kicking a pillar, only for it to sprout a leg and kick him in return.

"And you more than deserved that," Jenkins muttered back. He'd astutely observed that Jacob appeared to admire Clara, if only from afar, watching her when he thought no-one else was looking. It was all done very discreetly, and apart from his outburst on the stairs just after he'd been enchanted by Circe, Jacob had given nothing else away of his true feelings. To the world, his initial infatuation with Clara had apparently faded into a strange sort of comradeship composed of friendship and froideur, Clara turning on Jacob at the slightest thing, before throwing herself into his arms the next. But all the while, a storm had been stirring, and Jenkins was just waiting for it to finally hit.

"Ta-da!" Cassandra said, suddenly bursting through the back door.

"What the" -

- "I know," Cassandra said, cutting Eve off, "but it's worth it!"

"What was worth what?" Ezekiel asked, brow furrowing.

"A free pass," Cassandra said cryptically, handing a brown paper package over to Jenkins.

"What, through the back door?" Clara said, curiosity caught despite herself.

"In exchange for a knitted jumper and matching tea-cosy," Cassandra beamed. "I made them myself, with a little teacup motif on the cuffs and collar."

"You bribed Jenkins?" Ezekiel said, nodding approvingly. "Nice one."

"For a whole month, I get to avoid the perils of public transport," Cassandra said, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "Just travelling straight from the shower to here, with no traffic jams inbetween."

"She's your favourite, isn't she?" Eve said, turning to Jenkins.

"Yes," Jenkins said abruptly. "She possesses a modicum of intelligence the rest of you rather lack."

"Arghh!" Ezekiel suddenly exclaimed, as the clippings book swooped over him, making him throw his arms over his head. "Why does it keep dive-bombing me!?" he whined, ducking behind a bookcase.

"It's good for its digestion," Jenkins said dourly, just as the clippings book burped on cue, showering them with scraps of paper.

"Local beauty queen chokes to death on a piece of apple," Clara read out, frowning.

"Giant pumpkin wins prize," Cassandra said, flicking through fragments, "three bears terrorize local town, Prom King loses Prom Queen at midnight" -

"Traffic crash on bridge in Bremen?" Jacob said in disbelief.

"Magic versus the mundane," Jenkins said, rolling his eyes.

~*~

Clara tottered out of the toilet, feeling like she was going to throw up, only to find herself on a porch. As the others joined her, staggering and stumbling, Ezekiel looking rather green, Clara glanced around her, confused. It wasn't the first time Clara had been magically deposited in a public toilet, but it had at least been clean. This toilet, more hut than anything else, was a blot on the existence of all things toiletry. The stench alone was enough to knock out an elephant.

"Pass me my smelling salts," Ezekiel moaned, slumping against the railing.

"We're in the middle of nowhere," Cassandra observed, observing the wide expanse of mountains and lake surrounding them.