𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆 ━ g.impact x reader

𝟎𝟑 │ albedo & xiao x reader (separately)

➜ G/N Reader !

➜ Characters included : Albedo & Xiao

➜ angst

➜ Warning : tw for self-harm 

in which you commited self harm and the boys walk in on you.

❞ That position of the blade is dangerously close to a vein that could potentially kill you, you know? I would advise against cutting that part— actually not that part only, for all part of your body. ❞

Albedo seemed relatively calm when he entered the room he and his s/o shared, gazing at his beloved who was in the process of slitting another cut on their wrist. Their tearful gaze landing on him, tears that are threatening to spill at any moment. But just because Albedo was calm on the outside doesn't mean he's calm on the inside. His mind was racing so fast that he thought it malfunctioned, the usually level-headed person is internally panicking at the sight of his beloved self-harming themselves. He wanted to cry, he wanted to scream, he wanted to kill the one who made you do this, but he doesn't. Taking a deep breath as he decided the best course of action is to calm himself down before he calm you. Taking small steps towards you to not make you panic, fully aware of the panic-filled eyes fixated on his every moves. Lowering himself to be at the same level as you, he slowly hold his hand out for the knife. With his eyes, he urged you to hand him the knife. When you finally did, he drop it to the ground beside him. His heart is breaking internally when he heard a hiccup coming from you, looking back at you, you were sobbing. Apology after apology spilled out of your mouth as you pathetically sob in front of him. Frowning at the thought of you needing to apologize for this, he asked softly "may i hug you?" When you grant him the permission, he wraps his arms around you and shush you gently, cradling the back of your head with one of his hands. He can feel his own eyes tearing up but he manage to control them from spilling. Even though he doesn't understand why you did that or what you're feeling, he can understand it was a heavy burden on the heart. The insecurity that the world created for the people within, the stress that developed after hard days of work, the betrayal, and so on. Even though Albedo is known for his own genius mind, he couldn't find a solution to your problem. This was certainly harder than those experiments he conducted on every organisms he encountered, much harder than trying to decipher the meaning of the world. For the first time in his life, he felt completely useless. He couldn't contain his tears anymore as he quietly sobbed with you. How he wished he could share your pain, the same burden that weighs your heart, the same wicked thoughts that plagues your mind everyday. He knew this relationship needs both parties to work with each other, he knew this would be a hard road, he knew the pros and cons in this relationship, but he couldn't careless. He was another fool in love. He followed what his heart desired and he would stick with it. He would be the one to pick you up when you fall. He would be the one who'll dry your tears when they fall from your eyes. He would be the one that'll comfort you when you feel down, he will be your everything.Leaning back and pressing his forehead against yours, sniffling a bit before giving you a weak smile. He doesn't need an explanation on why you did it. He doesn't need another apology from you. None of these is your fault afterall. It was the urge that's to blame. It's the world, it's the people. Wiping the dry tear tracks with his thumbs, he said lowly;

❞ We'll get through this together like always. You don't need to hide anything from me. You know I'll accept everything of you. These wounds that will leave a mark on your body are a symbol of what you went through and how you overcame them. There's no need to feel bad about them or cry about it. But please don't give in to your urges again okay? If they come haunting again, come to me. I'll make them disappear. Je t'aime, my love. ❞

❞ Foolish mortal, do you have a death wish or something? Self-inflicting wouldn't do you any good, especially considering your mortal life... so why? ❞

Xiao whispered the last part, almost like a mumble. Disbelief leaking at the end, probably his mind already processing what he's seeing. Voice slightly cracking, unable to hold up his proud persona. He couldn't understand why you were doing this to yourself. Was someone making you do this to yourself? That's probably the reason, no. That's the only reason you're doing this. He would be harsh and in-denial for the first few minutes, his mind unable to accept the fact that you're self-harming willingly. Raising his voice a bit when he asked the name of the culprit, he wants to know so that he can punish them. He wouldn't realize how hurting and scared you are when he grabbed you roughly and you flinched. His eyes widened at the action as he quickly lets go of your arm, taking steps back from you quickly. He made you cry. The one thing he swore to not do when you two got together. The image of you flinching repeatedly flash in his mind, making him feel more guilty. Looking back at your crying figure, his eyes landing on the knife that you were still holding. There's no time for him to sulk in his self-pity, you need him. Walking back towards you, he sat in front of you. His eyes eyeing the knife before locking eyes with your tear-filled ones, he swears he can feel his heart cracking at the sight. Taking a deep breath. he cups your face with both of his hands and made you look at him. You can see the sincere apology in his eyes and the unspoken words he's unable to say, why did you do this to yourself?Suddenly you started to breakdown again, but this time you kept repeatedly say "sorry". He noticed you let go of the knife and he sighed in relief, but he noticed the blood trickling down your arm. He quickly lets go of your face, reaching out for a random cloth around you two and wiped the blood.He hated seeing blood, most especially yours. The thought of you harming yourselves made Xiao gulped deeply, flashes of war appeared in his mind. Seeing countless blood from his fellow Adepti and the opposing opponents made him let out a shaky breath. But he doesn't understand why you would do this on yourselves. Even though he doesn't want to say anything, he can't help but ask why you did it. When he hears your reason, he nods his head. Now he understands what you're feeling. Staring at your wounds, he look up at you and let out a small smile.

❞ Please do not anymore frighten me. Don't harm yourself again. You have a relatively short life compared to us, Adepti. And I... still want to experience a life with you a little while longer. Come, let us fix your wounds. After that we can do whatever you want. For you, I suppose I can traverse the streets of the harbor. I... love you. ❞

━

If the thought of inflicting self-pain comes into your mind please speak with a loved one, family or friend of yours. If you have no one however , please don't be afraid to talk it out with me or even "online" friends. I've experienced and thought about it so many times but I was lucky enough to have that one friend and he helped me through it.