Shadows of the Past

Chapter 1

 It was somehow both near silent and deafeningly loud as my tires crunched over the gravel, wind silently gliding over the closed windows of the old truck. I had never imagined coming back to my childhood home, hoping to leave the small town and all its occupants in the rearview mirror when I drove away 6 years ago. Yet here I am, heading straight to the place I had promised to forget even existed. At least I wasn't alone this time.

"We can always just turn around, ya know, if you don't wanna do this. We don't have to go" my best friend Dez suggested from the passenger seat. We met in a park not long after I had packed up and moved from home looking for a fresh start, I had pulled over to gather my thoughts and take a break to stretch my legs for a bit when his bull mastiff, Mini, knocked me over. Dez had been worried because despite her name, Mini is not a small dog and I hit the ground hard. Luckily, we were in the grass and not on the pavement. He helped me up and we somehow bonded over mutual clumsiness, sarcastic comments, and similar tastes in books and the rest was history.

"Yes we do, Dez. I can't run away from my issues forever, no matter how much I wish I could. That's not how life works unfortunately" I responded drily. I know he's only trying to help but right now I need assurance and support in the decision I made, not a way out. "I need to do this so that I can finally put this place behind me instead of just letting the hatred I have for this town fester in my soul. No good is going to come from that. If I can just take a couple days and tie up the loose ends I have here, then I'll finally be able to find peace and move on with my life and stop glancing over my shoulder thinking that my past is going to come and bite me in the ass! I'm so tired of living like this" I ranted, slowly getting louder as I went on.

"I get that Blake, but you gotta keep your options open. I'm on this trip with you so you don't get caught up in your thoughts and to remind you that you always have options. Just remember to breathe and keep your head high, this will all be over before you know it, I promise" he soothed. Dez has been the calm to my crazy since the moment we met, and I couldn't be more grateful than I am right now. From the moment I got that fateful text that sent us on the path to where we are now, he's been by my side every second, even going so far as to taking off work to come with me, helping inform our friends and coworkers about the situation I've been pulled into, and refusing to let me go down this road by myself. I have no idea what I would do without him.

I took a deep breath and slowly let it out, relaxing my aching muscles and mentally preparing myself for what comes next. "You're right, I'm sorry. I'm just so wound up right now" I felt bad for raising my voice at him.

"I know what'll cheer you up!" He reached for his phone and put on his road-trip playlist. I felt my mood lift as the beginning notes of Come Sail Away by Styx came through the speakers. It's almost impossible to be in a sour mood when that song is on, and your best friend is belting out the words in the seat next to you at full volume. Rolling down the windows, I turned up the radio and sang with him, laughing as the last of my anxiety melted away.

We laughed and sang along as the music went from Styx to Carrie Underwood to Fall Out Boy, losing ourselves in the music and just enjoying the drive without worrying about the destination. For the next couple of hours there was a sense of calm until we had to stop for gas and stretch our legs for a bit. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

Eventually we had to stop to rest for the night because I was falling asleep at the wheel and Dez was out cold snoring in the passenger seat. I was really hoping to just drive through the night but that isn't realistically possible. Pulling into the first motel with a vacancy sign I saw, I decided to check in before I tried waking Dez up. Anyone that knows him knows that after he falls asleep it's nearly impossible to get him back up for more than maybe 5 minutes. Thank goodness for close spaces and well-lit parking lots otherwise it would've been a lot more nerve wracking to walk into the lonely motel alone at night. I went into the office and got us a double room for the night then went to wake Dez up and guide him to bed. Once we got into our room, I triple checked the locked door, turned off the lights, and crawled into the unoccupied bed. Listening to the soft snores coming from my best friend in the bed next to mine, I slowly drifted off into a peaceful dreamless sleep.