Please Let Me Go (dnf)

Reckless Indulgence

Music was blasting through the speakers in Dream's car, the slight crackling noise from the bass etched into each lyric. This was Dream's second drive home from the airport today. At first, Dream thought it was a great idea that Sapnap offered to ride along with him for this trip, but that was clearly a mistake. Sapnap took over the small talk with Jack and Niki on the drive there, which Dream was thankful for, but he didn't realize how much he needed that silent drive back home until Sapnap refused to let there be a moment of peace in the car. This was probably because neither of them had talked about their conversation in Sapnap's bed since they left the room. Any pause in the playlist meant an open door for the conversation to resume, which neither of them wanted.

Ignoring the feelings that gushed out of them in the emotion fueled conversations was also part of the ritual. If you're venting, you lay down. If you cry, the other person isn't allowed to talk. And most importantly, when you leave the room, you don't speak of it again. At least, that's how it used to be. Since George's arrival, Sapnap had been breaking that last rule quite often. Whether it was raised eyebrows and darting eyes when George said something unexpected in a conversation, or Sapnap blatantly asking Dream how he felt about something George did, Dream really missed the days when they both respected all the rules.

Dream was essentially dissociating at this point, mindlessly driving the same memorized trip from the airport, using all his mental energy to block out the noise of Sapnap yelling along to the music. This was how most of his car rides went when he was driving others around. He enjoyed the free pass driving gave him from participating in conversation, claiming he needed to be quiet in order to focus on the road. It wasn't until Sapnap's hand came into Dream's peripheral that he zoned back into reality, Sapnap's hand waving in front of his face.

"Dude- I'm trying to drive, what the fuck?" Dream swatted Sapnap's hand away, readjusting in his seat. The music was off now, the silence of the car feeling less calming than Dream would have liked. A sign for the town over from theirs came into view, it was only two miles away. Shit. No wonder Sapnap was trying to get his attention. Dream missed their exit, he missed it by about fifteen miles.

"Oh, fuck. Sorry." Dream muttered, switching lanes to take the upcoming exit. This wasn't how he wanted today to go. This wasn't how he wanted any of their friends' trip to go. Locked away in his room for hours at a time, not joining them for day trips and outings, making the entire time about himself. Since when did he become such a self absorbed person? What happened to the guy who lit up every conversation he entered? Well, it was a lot easier when those conversations were only online.

"You're doing it again- Jesus, just pull over and let me drive." Sapnap sighed, leaning back in his seat as Dream drove past the exit. The drive to the airport was long enough on its own, these unwanted detours were only adding to the time they spent ignoring their unfinished conversation. Dream rolled his eyes at Sapnap, clearly ignoring his request. Dream didn't let anyone drive his car, let alone Sapnap. Dream could already picture Sapnap getting a speeding ticket, weaving through traffic down the highway, and probably hitting at least one curb. Yeah, even if it meant an additional thirty minutes to their drive, Dream would rather stay behind the wheel.

"You act like you want to go home and face them. I mean, what are we even supposed to do without everyone as a buffer?" Dream was half just thinking out loud. He really hadn't considered what it was going to be like if Sapnap and Karl also got themselves into a predicament. Dream figured he had some sort of claim on the 'feelings for my best friend turned sour' situation, but now they were sharing that title. He could've survived, maybe just barely- but still, the time with just the four of them if Sapnap could do most of the heavy lifting on the hosting front. Now the rest of George and Karl's stay was going to be like the world's weirdest episode of wife swap- Dream entertaining Karl, while Sapnap dealt with George.