Falling For A Man I Can't Have(Epistolary)

Entry 004

From: YourFutureWife@gmail.com

To: SpecialSomeone@gmail.com

Greetings!

This is my dream,a dream with you that will never come true. This is how I feel when we are in the same place.

The more time I spend with you, the more I want you to be mine. I've reached a stage where I want more.....I want more than a simple eye contact, I want days out and dinners, nights over and mornings together. I want cuddles and caresses, to hold and to be held. I want to know what your lips would feel like on mine - that first instance they meet, and every time thereafter. I want to walk down the street or along the river with your hand in mine.

There are so many things I like about you. And to list them out would only make it that much harder. But if I had one thing to say to her, it would be: do you realize how good you have it?

You're the first guy to make me think about marriage, you're definitely the first man I've thought about marrying. I'm not saying I've planned for a wedding or babies or anything like that. And I'm not trying to be overly sentimental. It's more of a feeling I get when I'm with you - of having you, of wanting you, in my life forever of happiness.

But every dreamer has to wake, and to accept the realities that bind their fantasies. At the end of the day, you still go home to her. You still belong to her. Even after all that she's said and done to you, all the physical pain and emotional scars she's inflicted upon you, all the times I've pleaded with you to stop being such a damn hero, to stop trying to save her and to save yourself, even though you claim you're halfway out the door.....the bottom line is, you're still with her. And as much as I want you to be, you're not mine and I'm not sure you ever will be.

Yours Faithfully,
Someone you'll never like