I Don't Smile

Chapter 7 - Friends?

Nathaniel's car. Also, isn't this song just hilarious with this chapter??

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Ohmygodohmygogohmygod.

He's a fighter.

Not a boxer. Not a wrestler.

No. Nathaniel Lincoln is a full-on fighter.

And he's brutal.

I've never seen something so violent. They had to carry the other guy out of the ring. And there was so much blood.

I get it now. I get why people are so scared of him. Nathaniel is a beast of a man. I watched him in that fight. Every second of it, my eyes wouldn't dare to leave him. It was like I was stuck there. I couldn't look away.

Every swing of his arm, clench of his fist, every step he took, each time he shook his sweaty hair out of his eyes, every single move Nathaniel made, I saw. I watched the blood splatter on his skin, the sweat drip off his shoulders when he leaned over, the way his knuckles busted through his wrap and turned it a dark red.

I didn't even realize the fight was over until Nathaniel made eye contact with me. His eyes were darker than the usual glassy green, they were a deeper emerald, and I can only describe the look in them as primal. I watched as he rolled his shoulders back, spit his mouth guard into his hand, and waited until the ref stepped in and raised his arm, declared him the champ again. And then I watched his back as he left the ring and returned down that hallway to the locker room.

"Oh my god. What the fuck was that?" I flinch at Mark's question; it was loud and pulled me out of the stupor I was in.

"There's no way that actually just happened," Anna responds. She looks like she's in just as much shock as I am, her blue eyes wide.

"Jasmine, Nathaniel wants to see you." And there's Jeremy again. Nathaniel wants to see me. How nice. He can't honestly think that I want to see him after what just went down, right?

Well, don't you? Don't start lying to yourself now, Jas.

My brain is right. I do want to see him. Some sick, twisted part of me liked watching him in that fight. It made me hot in the stomach, and throb even lower. And right now, I can think of nothing better than getting to see him again. What is wrong with me?

"Um, yeah, one second, Jeremy," Claire says and to emphasize, she puts one of her manicured fingers in the air.

And then, the three of them are circling me again.

"Jas, he just absolutely ruined that guy. Like, no way was what just happened legal. That dude is definitely going to be hospitalized. Are you sure you want to go back there with him alone?" Claire, ever the reasonable.

"I mean, he didn't hurt me when I was back there before. I'm sure I'll be fine. If you don't hear from me in 10 minutes though, you can come looking for me," I respond. I'm trying to sound neutral – not scared, but not eager either. Indifferent.

I watch the gears turn in Anna's head as I talk. She cocks her head to side, then gives one of her signature dirty grins and says, "You want to go see him. He got you all hot and bothered, huh? I knew you were a freaky bitch. Right on, girl. Go get yours!" And with that, she gives me a light shove in the direction of the locker room and off I go.

I push through the crowd of people still lingering around the ring and find myself in front of that door again.

You got this, Jas. Come on, don't get scared on me.