Sticky Notes For My Family (one shot)

This is about family and if youre looking for romance, stop reading this :)

Play the music first before reading this.

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 Alam kong nahihirapan na sila.

Ako rin naman eh! Nahihirapan:(

Kamakailan ko lang nalaman yun totoo.

buong buhay ko akala ko walang limitasyon, meron pala:(

Tinago nila yung totoo. Masisi mo ba naman sila? Mahal  nila ako eh! Bawal ganito, bawal ganyan. Maraming bawal pero lahat sinusunod ko kasi akala ko mapapasaya ko sila nun. Pero hindi, para sa akin pala talaga yun. Alam ko sa sarili ko hindi ako nagagalit pero hindi naman natin maiwasang magtampo diba?

Ikaw ba naman yung malaman mo nasa labing anim na taon mong pamumuhay dito sa mundo eh...

mamatay kana pala? :(

May sakit ako sa puso. Specifically may butas ako sa puso. There is only 25% chance that I'll survive in heart transplant. I'ts only 25% and i wouldn't take that risk i mean....... I dont know (undecided).

Maraming tanong. Kung kukunin ko yung operation mamatay ako at mapapadali lang nun yung buhay ko. Pwede ring mabuhay ako and live happily ever after.

Nalilito na talaga ako.

Siguro I need sometime to clarify things.

After kung magsulat sa diary ko, nag empake na ako.

Gamot - check

toiletries - check

Damit - check

5 days lang siguro ako dun sa tagaytay. Inilibot ko yung ko sa kwarto ko. "I will miss this for 5 days..... or maybe forever" :( I whisper. A tear fell from my eye. I couldn't help but to think and ask some what if's. What if i'm not a bluebaby? What if im normal? What if i knew my sickness when I was a child? Would I value my life? But then i realize, LIFE IS  UNFAIR and it's upto you how to deal it. It’s up to you if you mourn everyday for you not being normal either perfect.Or if you start your day with a smile and live happy every minute of it.

Bumaba na ako. Hindi naman siguro nila ako maririnig diba? Pipihitin ko na sana yung seradora pero nahagip ng mga mata ko yung sticky notes. Marami kaming alaala diyan. My mom used to wrote her 'To Do List' there and my dad as well. I used to wrote my sorry's there if i broke some fragile things. My ate used to wrote her apologies if im mad at her and vice versa. And now i will write there my very first message...... or maybe the last for them.

Hi dad,mom and ate

   I know i'm such a brat for this past few years. No scratch that, this sixteen years of my existence to be exact. Im disobeying you and mom but eventhough Im acting like that, I will  and I always love you.

A teardrop fell from my eye. Nagpatuloy na ako sa pagsusulat.

Sa tuwing sasabihin mo dad kung gaano mo ako kagusto maging civil engineer, naiiyak ako. Coz i know i can't do that now:(

Hindi ko magagawa yan dahil baka bukas, makalawa kukunin na Niya ako sa inyo:(

Alam ko hindi ako perpektong anak. Pero kahit ganito ako, alam ko may pakialam ako sainyo. Minahal, minamahal at mamahalin ko kayo, kayo ni mama.

Patuloy lang sa pag-agos yung luha ko.

Kahit kunin na Niya ako. Kahit nakatira na ako sa kaharian Niya, hinding hindi parin mawawala tong pagmamahal ko sainyo. Kayo yata yung 'The best parent ever'. 'The best family ever' perhaps. Mom sorry sa pagiging maldita ko. Sadyang may period lang po talaga ako araw araw XD.

I wipe my tears away and start to have some flashback memories of me and my family.

Thanks mom for not giving up on my bitchness and for always staying beside me. Hindi ko man kayo mabigyan ng mga letters sa nagdaang Mother's Day pero lahat ng mga mensahe ko sainyo nakatatak lahat yun sa diary ko.

I love my mom but ni isang beses hindi ko pa nasabi yan. Pero i'm expressing it naman and diba they say action speaks louder than voice.

Thanks mom for carrying me for nine months, For giving birth on me, for caring me and most especially for LOVING me unconditionally.

Sorry mom for bitching you 24/7 BUT if i have TIME i will change.......... i will:(

Ate sorry if parati kitang inaaway. Way ko lang naman yun para lambingin ka eh! You were my first bestfriend, my first enemy and my first fight happens between you and me.

Unique right? yeah coz our band is different from others.

You were the best sister ever at hinding hindi ko yun ipagpapalit. I know im bitching you everyday but remember this..

"HUUUUUUUUUUUUHh" hindi ako makahinga "HUUUUUUU" Hindi talaga ako makahinga pero kakayanin ko to kailangan masulat ko kung gaano ko sila ka mahal

I LOVE YOU MY ATE.

Bumulagta na ako sa sahig. Kinapa kapa ko yun bag ko pero hindi ko maabot. "Kaya ko pa to" sabi ko sa isip ko. Kung sisigaw ako, hindi nila ako maririnig kaya gumapang nalang ako papunta sa mesa at i nihulog yung vase para gumawa ng ingay. Yung ikalawang vase naman yung tinapon ko. At sa pangatlong vase na binasag ko , nagdilim na yung paningin ko. Ang huli ko lang na narinig ay yung pagtawag nina mama at papa sa akin.

"ANDREA!"

WAKAS