A Book of Alastor x Reader Oneshots 🦌✨ (DISCONTINUED)

Human! Alastor x reader

[ ayo this cover art got me actin up. Does he have a dog? I can bark. woof woof ;) ]
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[TW: cannibalism, murder]
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It was a dark and eerie autumn night in New Orleans, Louisiana. The streets were dimly lit by old street lights. The smell of bourbon and cigarette smoke filled the cold air. You were walking down the French Quarters from your work, acknowledging that there was absolutely no one roaming the streets. No jazz music. No horses. Absolutely nothing, probably because of the fact that there was a mass killer on the loose. You were just a pretty young woman in her early 20s. You chuckled to yourself, knowing that no one would ever suspect that you knew everything about all of these murders...

"It's me, my dear!" you exclaimed as you waltzed into your big beautiful home you shared with your husband, after you locked all twelve bolts at the front door. He was a radio host, and you were a telephone operator, so you both were financially stable. "Oh, there you are darling!" you heard your husband shout from a back room in the basement. He was.. preparing dinner, you two would call it. Suddenly, he came walking up the basement steps with a large pot of raw meat for you to prepare for dinner. You blushed at your husband as you admired his thick and soft brown hair, honey brown eyes, and the blood-soaked apron wrapped around him, protecting his white dress shirt. He was your pride and joy. "Well don't you look just dapper!" you smiled as you wiped some blood off of his cheek. He set the pot onto the kitchen countertop and picked you up bridal style, giving you a passionate kiss on the lips. "You look quite dashing yourself, my love. Almost good enough to eat." You playfully hit him on the shoulder after he gently set you back on your feet. "That's very funny, Alastor" you laughed as you started to season the local milk man's sliced hand. Dinner was gonna be delicious.

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You decided to make some jambalaya that night. The cajun rice and savory human flesh were a perfect combo. "Oh honey, this is wonderful! How do you do it?" your husband complimented with a mouthful of the cannibalized dish. "Don't choke dear. The food won't run away!" you morbidly joked. You both laughed menacingly. Soon, you both finished and decided to go to bed. You and Alastor always listened to the last radio broadcast of the night before going to sleep. It was always a pre-recording scheduled to go on air for that specific time every night. As you crawled into bed with your loving husband, static flowed out of the radio.

"Good evening, New Orleans! We have unfortunate news that another murder happened last night in an alleyway on Bourbon Street. The name of the victim was John LeFleur, known as a local milk man. He was identified by his severed head that was found at the scene. The location of the rest of his body is unknown. It's just terrible how someone could do such a thing to an innocent person! Well, stay safe New Orleans! I'm your radio host, Alastor Duvalier. Stay Tuned..."

"How terrible! How could someone just kill a random person in an alleyway.." you sarcastically said with a smirk. After a long laugh coming from you both, you nuzzled into Alastor's arms. "How entertaining it is to act like I know absolutely nothing about this killer! Or should I say, killers!" your husband said. "Quite entertaining it is, my love. Now, let's rest" you sleepily said. You kissed Alastor on the lips before falling sound asleep in his arms.