Your Guardian Angel | KSJ

Biscuits

"What happened?" Jin's voice is low as he thumbs up the sleeve of your shirt, exposing the mottled bruising along your forearm.

You flinch away from him, shrugging your sleeve back down. "Bumped into something, it's fine." You dismiss him with a wave of your other hand. "Can we please focus on the board?"

He lets out a frustrated grunt bringing his attention back to the computer. He clicks through a few more slides. "I don't know how you expect me to honestly ignore that. I know what it is, how it happened, and I can't believe you're still with him." Jin's words are curt and simple. His eyes are trained on the screen but his hand has stilled on the mouse. You've had this conversation many times, it's always the same. He just doesn't understand, you're in love and love conquers all...right?

"Don't lecture me," you snipe back. "My business, my problem. Drop it." You swat his hand away from the mouse and take over clicking through the slides for the presentation you both are supposed to be working on.

Jin pushes his chair back, almost knocking it over as he stands in a rush. "I can't- this just-," he fumbles over his words, shoving a hand through his hair and making it stick up wildly. He takes a deep breath, hand falling to his face and covering his mouth. "Biscuits." The word is muffled but you know it like he's said it right into your ear. It's become somewhat of a safeword when either of you needs a moment. You purse your lips, refusing to look up at him because you know if you do you'll probably end up crying.

'Biscuits' started out innocently enough. You've known Seokjin since childhood. It was a dream come true when you both got into the same university and then like an otherworldly experience when you both landed jobs at the same company, giving you the opportunity to work together and continue to nurture your life-long friendship. At least, that was until 'biscuits'.

It was about three years ago now, funnily (or maybe not so funnily) enough around the same time you got together with your boyfriend, that this word first was used. It initially really had nothing to do with either you or Jin, it was just work in general. You were working on a project together with two other coworkers, Mina and Linny, when you snapped. You tried to say 'bitches' but you were so frustrated it came out as 'biscuits'. You stormed out of the room, refusing to talk to anyone until you calmed down. Later, when you explained to Jin what happened, you both laughed about it. It became a word to use when you needed to step away, sort of a way to let the other one know you're struggling...a secret way to communicate that is special to just you two.

You haven't had to use that word in a while, but it seems Jin is using it every other day now. You watch him walk away, shoving his hands into the pockets of his slacks. He hangs his head, you can faintly hear him muttering to himself as he disappears out of the office and into the hall. A pang of heavy guilt settles in your chest. You know you're the cause of his increased use of 'biscuits'. More often than not, it seems to be used when he tries to talk to you about your boyfriend.

You tug up the sleeve on your knit sweater, tracing over the dark brown and yellow mottling. The marks are clearly from fingers, a grip so tight it damages the soft tissues beneath your skin. Shaking the sleeve back down you clear your throat and bring your attention back to the computer.

However, you can't seem to focus.

He's making a bigger deal out of it than it is. For that matter, doesn't he realize I deserve this? I'm the one that pissed him off, I'm the one that caused this. He only grabbed me because I wouldn't listen to him...my fault- Jin just doesn't understand.

The minutes tick by, you periodically glance at the clock, waiting for Jin to return. It's almost been forty-five minutes so you decide to try and go look for him.