Perfect combination

Fear

I get in the car and start driving to school. I think about what I dreamt about last night and that i realized that I'm in love with Stiles. I knew that I liked him when I kissed him but I only just started loving him... Or maybe it's been ages that I have loved him but I just never admitted it. I need to tell Stiles but I don't even know how he will react I know he had a massive crush on me but I don't know if he does. He loves Malia he is over me but I still need to tell him. So that's it I'm telling him today at school and then he can say whatever he likes and I will go find some other boy toy and forget about what happens.
I park the car in the schools parking lot and starting walking towards the entrance. I start breathing heavily I can't I can't tell him what was I thinking I can't I'm I'm having a panic attack I breath faster and faster what do you do to get you out of a panic attackkkk uhh hold your breath. I think of the time I kissed Stiles because he was having a panic attack how it felt and how I wish I could find him and kiss him. I have stopped panicking and I didn't even have to hold my breath. I'm gonna do this i tell myself.
"Stiles here's the thing I love you" I say quietly to myself
"I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOU"
"What!?" A voice says in front of me it's Scott
"Uhh um" I try to think of an excuse but instead I ask " Where is Stiles? He is always with you so yeah... Well this is awkward..."
"Uh hey Malia..." Scott says I turn around and see Malia who has a woirred face.
"Stiles is gone! I woke up and he was screaming and someone knocked me out and when I woke up again he was gone and I tried to sniff him out but nothing! Not a single thing" Malia starts crying. "I love him I can't lose him! And I didn't know what to do so I I I I I tried to sniff him but I couldn't"
Useless bitch I think to myself. Malia looks at my as if I offended her
"What did you just call me!?" Malia asks. She has stopped crying.
"Hmm?" Oh my god i said it out loud what do I do... "I didn't call you anything I said I'm a useless bitch"
"What no you're not"
"Yes I am. I mean you have claws, sharp teeth, glowing eyes, heightened senses and you know what I've got? I've probably got it go pluck so god damn piano strings to get the voices in my head to start to tell me where the hell Stiles is! So yes I am a useless bitch" I start to get tears in my eyes because everything I just said was true. "So I am going to go to Stiles's room and just sit and wait and maybe just maybe get voices it my head but I will also be hoping I won't start screaming because one of you is dead. And if I go with you to wherever the hell he is I will be the one dead because i don't know a thing about combat or how to stay alive in those situations it just happens" I start to cry Harder
"Lydia are you o..."
"Just find Stiles!" I cut malia off and walk away