Fannon illumi x reader smut (gender neutral reader)

Birthday cake fun

It was hisokas birthday. Pretty normal right?

Yeah it was.. until..

"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear hisokaaa! Happy birthday to you!" You sang.

Hisoka blew his candles

"It's been such a great day already! I cant wait to have some cake~" hisoka smiled.

Illumi was sitting on the table next to hisokas cake, facing him.

"Do you want some of my cake lu?" Hisoka smirked grabbing himself a piece.

"Sure, but you take a bite first." He sipped from his cup of apple juice.

"Alright~"

hisoka grabbed a little piece of cake and put it in his mouth, before he could swallow (he was chewing) Illumi grabbed his face and kissed him hard trying to get little pieces of cake into his mouth. Eventually he got enough so he let hisoka go and swallowed the cake he got from hisoka.

"Thank you." Illumi sat back on the table and crossed his legs. his hands behind him supporting his weight.

Hisoka looked at him flustered and slightly concerned and then he went back to eating his cake.

                       - - - - - - - - -

A while later.. things got.. weird.
Like usual, Illumi got extremely horny. The cake still wasn't done. Hisoka was sitting on the couch away from the cake, but Illumi was still next to it. Illumi decided he would give hisoka another suprise. One that involved shoving food up his anus.

Illumi took all his clothes off and neatly folded them on the table. He then proceeded to sit back on the table and he spread his legs. He scooped some cake with his hand, and started shoving it in his asshole. It was kind of sticky, but expected. He kept doing this until the whole cake was up his ass. to be cute, he went to the kitchen and grabbed some whipped cream and layed on the table legs still spread. He then put some whipped cream on his asshole and waited for someone to come and eat the wonderful suprise inside him.

                  - - - - - - - - - - - -

Hisokas pov:

I walked to the dining room to get some more cake but as I walked in I saw a.. suprise. Illumi was laying on the table legs spread with some melting whipped cream on his arsehole.

"Illumi..?"

"Ahh hisoka I've been waiting for you. You want cake?"

"Well yes that's why I came here."

"It's inside me."

"What."

Illumi grabbed his ass and spread his asshole inviting me to come eat him out.

"Come have a taste hisoka. You know you want it."

I slowly walk to Illumi and get on the table then I spread his legs and go near his anus.. once I was there I-

HAHA YOU THOUGHT THIS CHAPTER WAS GONNA BE MORE NORMAL? FUCK NO!! ILLUMI COULDNT HANDLE THE FACT THAT HISOKA WAS ACTUALLY GONNA EAT HIM OUT SO HE STARTED SHITTING ALL THE CAKE AND ACTUAL SHIT DIABOLICALLY ONTO HISOKAS FACE! OH NO! HISOKA SLOWLY GOT UP AND WIPED EVERYTHING FROM HIS FACE AND STARTED SOBBING ILLUM THEN PROCEEDED TO MAKE CAKE WITH ALL THE SHIT HE JUST.. WELL, SHIT OUT!
"Here hisoka another cake!" ILLUMI SAID MOANING OUT LOUD. HE THEN STARTED RUBBING HIS NIPPLES AND STARTED SQUIRTING EVERYWHERE (with pee ;))
FUCK! EVERYTHING JUST WENT TERRIBLE.. ILLUMI ENDED UP PASSING OUT ONTO HIS SHIT CAKE AND HISOKA KEPT SOBBING.

Did you forget this was originally an illumi x reader? Yes me too, but don't worry you'll come into play.

You came into the room after watching hardcore scat porn and widened your eyes.

"Hisoka..what the hell happened in here?"

"I-i was just gonna *sniffle* eat illumi out and then he sprayed shit on me.."

He started crying again.

You sighed happily. "Oh dear, must've been fun."

Hisoka looked at you with a bitchy look

"Sorry i forget your not into these types of things haha. Well let's just clean him up okay?"

"Okay.."

                          -tommorow. -

"Hisoka!"  Illumi called from the kitchen.

Hisoka walked in and saw illumi naked sitting next to a chocolate cake.

"I felt really bad after what happened yesterday hiso.. I wanted to make it up to you so I made you a chocolate cake."

"Illumi.. that's so sweet. Thank you"

Hisoka didnt question why illumi was naked but smiled. Illumi cut him a piece and gave it to him smiling dearly. After hisoka took his first bite, his smile turned from sweet to sinister.

"Illumi. There's no fucking way I am eating anything but chocolate cake right now. Correct?"

"Ahh hisoka. I made that with all my heart."

"That wasn't the question.. illumi what is this!?" Hisoka spit out the cake.

"Ahh~" Illumi started rubbing his nipples and his hard cock.

"Illumi!!" Hisoka started sobbing hysterically. It was a cake, but made out of illumis shit.

"Haah~ fuck hisoka~ you knew that wasn't going to be a fucking cake~" illumi stroked himself faster.

Hisoka just kept crying, at some point he even started whimpering.

Illumi was so close to climax, that was the horniest he's ever been.

"fuck! Oh my god!~"

Illumi started cumming on hisoka. All over hisoka. Hisoka just cried harder.

It was a catastrophe.

The end.