I was at my new house; cleaning, dusting in particular. I was so ready to move in here. At first I didn't want to move but I grown an attachment to this house. The lake, the new space, I was excited. I was still texting Shamoyy from earlier today and we were having a blast.
Shamoyy: So are you ready for me to call you?
"Lol yea just give me a minute." I sent.
At this point, I was panicking. I have never been the type to get overly nervous over talking on the phone. Something about him was different, maybe because this is the first guy I've actually liked. I had a few crushes here and there, but that was middle school, nor did I ever associate with my crushes. I was in the bathroom mirror, leaning on my sink, trying to give words of encouragement.
"Okay Bahj..." I took a deep breath. "Just talk how ya'll talk over text. It can't be that hard." I sighed. I started to practice how I'd say Hello. "Hello! No, too cheery." "Hello." Too high, I need to do a deeper voice. "Helloo.. Too sexy." "UGH!" I groaned in frustration. "Hey.." ..........Perfect. I went back into my empty room and texted him.
"Okay, call me." I texted.
Almost a minute later, I heard my ringtone. I closed my eyes and started panicking again. My fingers were numb, and I didn't want to pick up the phone. But in the knick of time, before it went to voicemail, I answered on the last ring.
"Hello?" I heard a voice I wasn't expecting out of him. Damn..I thought in my head. "Umm Hi?" I face palmed myself. Come on Bahja...we practiced for this. He chuckled, "Hi. What you up to? Still cleaning?" "Yea, just dusting up meee room!" I chuckled as he chuckled along..
And from there, we stayed on the phone for hours. I told him things I never told anybody. Things about my family and all, I felt comfortable with him. Like I could trust him. A few weeks later, I found myself calling him my boyfriend. I still haven't seen him in person yet, however, we didn't really focus on that. A month passed and we finally set up a date at the movies. Because I was only 14, I was a little nervous to tell my parents I was meeting up with a boy when I told them I was going to the movies. So I got all my girlfriends together, to cover up the real reason I wanted to go to the movies. My mom and dad believed I shouldn't date til I was 16, and I've been doing so well with hiding my little boyfriends in elementary and middle school. Even tho I never really talked to boys like that anyways, at one point in time my mom questioned my sexuality. Cause she never seen me talk to a guy, never had a boy contact, I just never talked about them. Pulling up to the movie theater, I got a text from Shamoyy telling me he was here. I got out the car and watched my mom and aunt drive off to go park. My girlfriend Namiko was already here so that calmed me down a little bit. I hugged her before sending a text. "Where are you?" I texted. "In the lobby. You?" He replied. "I'm outside." "Okay I'm coming out." By the time he sent that, my aunt was approaching me and I was getting more nervous by the second. "You decided on what movie y'all going to see?" She asked. I felt a presence behind me and looked and seem him. I turned away from him and continued to answer. "Nah, not really. We will figure it out." I looked up at her to see her looking between me and Shamoyy. I looked behind me and he was still standing awkwardly, rocking on his feet, with his cellphone in his hands. "You know him?" She asked. "uhh yea. Hey, what are you doing here?" His eyebrow twitched and his head cocked to the side. "Bahja come here." My aunt grabbed my shoulder, bringing me in. "Excuse us." She told him. He nodded and she led walked us away to talk. "You're not slick little girl. You know why he here. Look we've all been here before. You know you can talk to yah momma. If you was coming to meet him just tell her that. It'll make her proud knowing that her daughter can talk to her. You'll make her think you don't trust her. Okay?" I put my head down and nodded. "Yes Ma'am." "Alright, we going shopping, we will be back." She walked back to the car and got in the car with my mother. "That was awkward." He laughed as I walked his way. "I know, sorry about that." He pulled me into a hug. Wow he's so tall. My head comes to the bottom of his chest. That'll take some getting used to. "Shall we??" He held out his hand. "We shall." I smiled and we walked inside.
As we was watching the movie, his finger consistently rubbed the back of my hand. It made me feel at peace. Something I never felt before. When I was with him....I felt calm....collected....I felt closure. I felt happy. But I just wished he'd kiss me. I looked to my left and seen all of my friends tuned into the movie, I looked to my right and seen Shamoyy looking back at me. I smiled then brought my attention back to the movie screen; however, I still felt him burning a hole in the side of my face. Next thing you know, his finger is under my chin, turning my head, bringing me in for a kiss.
3 Nights Earlier
"I just wanna warn you, I've never made out with a guy before." I told him over the phone.
"Wow. me neither."
"Really?! I'd expect you to, I just wanted you to know before you call me a bad kisser. I don't know how to do it."
"We'll learn together Saturday okay? You'll be a pro by the end of the night." He laughed as I laughed along. He made me feel less lame about it.
Present
Our lips crashed together. And I was surprisingly the first to start moving my lips. We moved our lips together in sync; however, I knew there was more to it. I opened my mouth and slipped my tongue in between his lips. I closed my eyes as I allowed our tongues to meet and greet each other. It wasn't as hard as I thought. After 30 seconds of kissing, I became embarrassed and pulled back, slamming my back against my seat, tucking my lips in, looking down. "I can't believe I just did that." He tried to turn my head again but I gently snatched it back, I felt so out of my character. "Hey..look at me." He whispered. "You're an excellent kisser." He smiled, making me blush. I pecked his lips and laid my head on his shoulder.
This is when we used to be happy. When I used to be shy. When used to be courteous.
This is going kinda slow. I don't wanna rush this story. It's kinda sensitive to me lol.
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