Embrace This Silence

Chapter 6: A Confrontation

1

-I mean, it's like what even is happiness? Do we find these things in other people, places, or things? Our career, our ambitions? Why is it all so scary? Why can't anyone help me cope?

When the rushing thoughts come pouring in, I lose all sense of who I am. Where am I? Who am I? I was about to do very scary and dangerous things, indeed. And I was expected to just do them. Expected by who? Myself, I suppose.

Confrontation was not my specialty. I thought about what this man had done to me and what he may do again. He scared me. I had a gun. I didn't want to have to use it. And I sure as hell hoped I wouldn't-

I remember when time was moving slowly. Now, it just won't stop. The days and years and months and seconds, they all move at a blinding light. A blinding, blinding light.

Is it possible to get rid of these thoughts? These intrusive things?

Chelsea parked the car in front of Jacob's home, I could see his wife looking out of the window. Jacob was nowhere to be seen. Chelsea ran out of the car and knocked violently on the door as I walked up the driveway.

His wife answered the door immediately. "He's gone. He wants to meet you both here." She handed Chelsea a piece of paper. It had an address on it. It was just the diner over on Main Street, where I got my slice of pie not too long ago.

"Why here?" I asked. She merely shrugged and then shut the door, leaving us alone at the front door. She was liable. She knew what was happening. There's no way she didn't know. But then I realized. "Fuck, I know why he wants to meet here. We had our first date here."

"Oh Jesus. I can't believe he'd fucking do this. How did he even know we were coming?" Chelsea replied.

"I'm sure that asshole from the club told him or something. It's time to just end this already." I said with determination. My hands were trembling as I stepped back into the car. Fuck all of this. I sent Jeffers a text and he followed us with his small convoy to the diner.

2

It was 10:30 A.M. on a Saturday back in high school. This cute boy had asked me out. We had started talking in class and in the hallways sometimes. He was a relatively popular kid, he played sports. I was a quiet, normal kid with a couple of friends. I just tried to stay out of trouble.

"So," Jacob began as he took a sip of his coffee, "it's our senior year. Do I have to ask the awful question?"

I laughed. "I'm going to college."

"Great. Where are you going?" He smirked at me.

"It's a small liberal arts school in Massachusetts. I needed a change of pace, you know? And it's a great school."

"What are you gonna major in?"

I laughed again, nervously. "I don't know for sure. I have an interest in English and Criminal Justice." I did both, and now I'm some fucked-up mentally ill bisexual private investigator.

"That's cool. I'm staying around here for now. I like Texas, you know?" I liked Texas too, but I loathed Texas too. It was a complicated relationship.

"That's cool. So, are you headed to college?" I asked.

"I think I'm going to start at community college. I have an interest in law school, but I'm trying to figure that all out." I still don't know if he actually went to law school.