The way it goes

Selfish

I always put the blame on other people.

Everyone around me was already miserable and I don't think it was my fault. or maybe it was but I never acknowledged it. 

Is it worse if I'm the one who broke us all apart? I did what I could with what I had but maybe that wasn't enough. It was never enough for them. I either cared too much or not at all. If can't handle my own problems and know how I feel what made them think I could handle theirs.

They were the selfish ones not me! I tried so damn hard and it wasn't easy. Maybe my love was a bit acidic and just left destruction behind it. I was careless with their hearts, just like the people who handled my heart before them. I'm still sour about that.

All I wanted was someone to love and who would love me back but maybe that was just too much to ask for.

When I was with her I was different, I forgot about all the other stuff and I felt happy. She was just her. And she was enough. More than enough.

I loved her with all my heart. But one day she left. I found the note she left me and I broke down. How could she do this to me,why would she do this. If I had known I could've helped. She was selfish just like everyone else. They say the pain goes away with time. I waited a long time. And it was still there. I couldn't live with it anymore, so I decided to be selfish. I jumped at the exact same spot she did. So we could be together again. She was all I had. And that would never change. I'd rather die than live without her.

It was selfish. But I didn't care. I closed my eyes for the last time and let go of everything.