I tell myself that my career was enough all the time. That my career was enough to fill the void in my life. My career was the thing that got me to New York city. Where the city never sleeps. Where it was loud enough to block out my insecurities. Where it was loud enough to forget about her.
I snapped out of my train of thought when my brothers phone call displayed on my computer screen. I answered it and smiled a bit as i rested into my porch chair. "How are you baby sister" he asked with a happy tone. "Im okay. And hey im a baby by like 17 minutes" I said and he laughed. "Just okay?" He asked. Clearly acknowledging the fact that I haven't called much. "Its just cold. And its hard" I ached out and he sighed quietly. "Why don't you come home?" He asked and I stayed quiet for a minute. "I'd be giving up my career. I can barely get enough time to see my brother get married." I said adding a awkward laugh. "Can you remind me why exactly you're getting married in an old high school gym when we can afford something nicer?" I asked and he laughed loudly. "It's about the memories Haid" he said and I smiled. Id be getting married in a high school bathroom.
I sat in the empty airport as I tried to focus on the same paragraph I've been on all week. "I think your writing style is what isn't helping, if you had an open format it'd be easy to piece it together" A girl sitting behind me said. I rolled my eyes and turned to her. "My format has nothing to do with anything" I said and she smirked. "If it makes you feel better im a fan of your work. My class and I are reading your most recent" she said and I scanned her with my eyes before speaking again. "I don't think that book is appropriate for children" I said and she laughed. "I teach college sophomores, open your format a bit more and thank me later" she said winking and walking onto the same plane I was getting on.
I was even more annoyed when I took a seat next to her and she laughed as I took her advice about opening up my format. Which helped. Unfortunately. After a while I sent the new pages to my publisher and closed my laptop to see her grading papers. "It's great to see how many minds think so differently" she whispered not looking up from her paper. "I'd like to know how your mind thinks" she said clearly flirting with me. "Im going to my brothers wedding alone. Come with me and I'll consider it" I said and she smirked before nodding. "My name is Aziz" she added.
