Finding me 𓂀| ༒A story by Pollux ༒

Letter 2: Frustrated

I remember the first time my mother took me to a gothic store. I just wanted a choker. My mom walked in eyeing everyone in the shop. I followed behind. I knew exactly where to look as she followed me around the store, a worker came up offering a hand, and made sure we were finding things easily. My mother, instead of answering, looked at the women's makeup and outfit. She looked as if she were disappointed in this person. I took the lead telling the girl we were fine. She nodded and walked back to the register. I was worried my mother wouldn't let me buy the choker anymore. Wouldn't you guess, I was right. she rushed me outside of the store and stormed off dragging me behind. I hated this wall between me and who didn't want me to be me. That night in bed, I cried and cried. I was upset and furious. Waiting for a chance to be free, I thought it would never come. Every time I went with friends, my mon made sure to mention not to go to any dark edgy stores. My friends always went there and I was so frustrated. Soon enough, I thought, "if I want new clothes, my mom has to approve. So why not the opposite of edgy?" The new addition to my Pinterest board, kawaii soft aesthetic. Pastels, whites, neutrals. All of which my mom would approve! I was so happy to finally like something my mom would buy. But there was one thing I made sure of. Have cute outfits with edgy features whether it's just tights, platforms, anything! I had to have it in there! However, would I really feel like me?...