Our very last book

Chapter 4

It was before the beginning of the first class, while everybody was waiting for the teacher's arrival. I sat at my desk, leaning onto my arm, staring out the window, too dreamy to go bother my classmates as a distraction. I swinged my feet under the table, barely touching the ground as I admired the clear sky. I ignored Kaito's loud grunts which filled the classroom with an annoying cacophony, I dismissed Miu's incessant wails which reminded me of roaring alarm clocks, I did my best to forget about all the commotion. However, the floor was trembling from everyone's rushing around, no peace could be found during this morning. It usually did not bother me, on the contrary, but today specially I wanted a little quiet for once.

I tiredly turned to the bunch, hoping that my silent stare would have a magical effect and shut them up, though not hoping for one second that it would actually work. Somehow, I found myself weirded out by the frenzy — I had gotten used to the calmer and quieter atmosphere around Shuichi which was missing today. I still craved to be in the spotlight, to take action, and I was close to throw my chair away and howl on top of a table to irritate the group, but I guess our meetings taught me how to hold back my crazy urges and savor the moment.

I noticed again what Shuichi really meant by "living in the present", which made me chuckle. I observed the people who were having fun, being alive, and strangely I found it pleasant to solely gaze at them. I felt less invading, less shallow, more analytical. But I could also feel that it was not going to be my cup of tea on the long run, I was just not the type of person to think rather than act. Though I can have a talk about this with Shuichi now, I could not wait to bring up the subject and listen to his soothing voice while he replied with his natural passion.

My thoughts got interrupted by Tenko's screaming as she was hugging Himiko to prevent her from getting fist bumped by Kiibo, who was still trying to fit in with people. The overprotective one was still being an unreasonable man-hater, not that anyone could do much about that. However, Gonta seemed perplexed — he must have suggested Kiibo to try it out once he learnt from someone that first-bumping was gentlemanly. He seemingly could not comprehend the negative feedback from the other. At least that was what I understood from him ogling his eyes in surprise and staring at his wide-open hands. Their stupidity made me want to chuckle, any crazier they would be dead.

However, I just had enough of their whining, so I grumbled under my breath and readied myself to raise my voice to manifest my needs to the class in order to make them zip their yapping mouths once and for all. I turned in their direction, inhaled deeply, and was about to employ the power of my vocal cords, when I noticed something peculiar.

"Hey, has anyone seen Shuichi?" I asked out loud instead of my intended complaint, pointing at his empty desk with a head movement.

The whole class stopped their charade to stare at me in surprise, not having expected me to be the one to worry about one of our absent friends. Or employing a non-condescending tone in general. Or both. Anyhow, nobody wanted or could answer my question, which pushed me to furrow my brows perplexed. Shuichi was never late, and never skipped school, there had to be something going on with him.

I tried not to imagine the worse, but I discovered how irrational my thoughts were when they were about Shuichi in particular. I bit my lower lip while gazing at his seat, forcing myself to calm down since my worry was completely baseless. Especially since nobody seemed any more anxious than usual, they did not look alarmed at all.

"I don't know, now that you mention it..." Kaito hummed a reply distracted, "It's been a while since he talked to me though. I know that he is busy, perhaps his business has to do with this but..."

"Busy?" I remarked with an indiscernible tone, "Huh."

It was a rather simple and straightforward lie in order to keep his friends away from him without arousing suspicion. Though the one dimensionality of it proved that he was not just conveniently not talking about the issue, but clearly hiding it. Or at least concealing it from Kaito, not that this nuance mattered since he was friends with almost if not everyone in the room. I glanced at Kaede, Maki, and everybody else, who stared at me with curious expressions.