the devil in miami • xxxtentacion

005

nova
friday• 5:19pm

"that was the funniest shit i had heard all day" ally says in between laughter, through the phone.

ever since that day at the studio, about 3 weeks ago, me and ally have been texting, talking on the phone and hanging out. She met my grandma, and she actually seemed to like her. Ally is actually really cool, and she's the girlfriend of juice, which is one of the boys that jah hangs out with.

speaking of jah, i haven't seen him since that night at the studio. after he finished his songs, we went and got something to eat from a nearby diner and afterwards they dropped me back off at home around 3 a.m. we text from time to time, which is usually when he wants to reply. it seem's like jah just comes and and goes when he wants, which probably shouldn't bother me but it does.

"oooo" i hear ally say, knocking me out of my thoughts.

"what is it?" i reply, hearing clicking on the other side of the phone.

"the boys are having a tattoo party" she starts, "im going... i told them i would ask you if you wanted to come" she finishes, coming back to the camera.

" what is that?" i ask, typing it into google before she can respond.

so it's a party where everyone gets tattoos...hm, sounds interesting.

"it's basically a chill kickback, where a tattoo artist comes and gives everyone a tattoo of their choice" she explains, "we've done it a few times before, thats where all of these random tattoos come from" she says, showing me her tattoos through the phone.

"i don't know ally, a tattoo?" i say, unsure of such a commitment.

"weelllll, i already kinda sorta told them that you'd come" she starts and i sigh, playing with my hair. One of my anxious habits.

"plus, you dont have to get a tattoo if you don't want, but i think you should and plus plus...." she pauses as if she's thinking.

"jah wants to see you" she says, showing me a paused screen again as i hear her nails clicking against the screen.

as soon as she says that, it's like my stomach starts to flutter, and it tends to do that these days when i hear his name. if i wasn't going before, i was definatly going now just to see his face again. and maybe, just maybe i'd get a tattoo.

before i can get the chance to reply, she speaks again.

"ooo, this is my baby calling me...i'll see you tonight babes, i'll come grab you on my way there" she says before hanging up abruptly before i can respond.

as soon as ally hangs up, i lay back on my bed staring up at the ceiling, letting my thoughts consume me.

this is the first time that someone has made me feel like this, and it makes me want to be with him all the time, but he's so distant and im not sure how to make him warm up to me, but i know i have to try.

i shake myself out of my thoughts, knowing that's the last place i want, or should be. I get up from my bed, tidying up my room a bit before taking my medications and walking into the bathroom, turning the shower on. i lean against the counter looking at various tattoo inspiration pictures while i wait on the shower to warm up.

stepping into the shower which has to be next to boiling, i feel a sense of relaxation wash over me. i wonder what my grandma will say if i get a tattoo. these days she seems to be a little uptight about my whereabouts, who i see and what i'm doing.