You're All I Never Wanted // Jack Harries

chapter eight.

Author's note:

This was a terrible chapter. I hate it. But then, you know, it has to come out... :(

chapter eight.

Don't make me stay the night,

Or ask if I'm all right,

I don't have an answer.

-Irresistable (One Direction)

"Wha-" I turned to Finn.

"Yeah, I like you. Why do you think I was so tense? I didn't want you to come into my life and mess it all up! But I don't want to fight it anymore, I don't want the security anymore."

"But you said you were the player ki-"

"You weren't my type, that's why I was scared. You weren't my type but for some reason, I liked you. You were messing things up in my head, that's why I stayed as far from you as possible," he explained, looking at me, his eyes somehow pleading with me to understand.

Something in my heart surged with joy and pride. Someone liked me, and I never thought that would happen. Finn was attractive, I couldn't deny that. Maybe I do like him too. Yeah, I do. He was the one who knew what happened to me.

"Finn, I- I don't know what to say-"

"Eliza, I know you'll never like me- there'll always be-"

I shook my head violently. "I-"

"Finn?!" Jack exclaimed. "I'm still here!"

"Jack."

He turned to me, his expression incredibly unreadable even though I knew how to read people very well. "What? Are you trying to tell me you like Finn Harries as well?" He asked incredulously.

"I don't know! That's the point!" I exclaimed just as loudly as Jack had been speaking. "God, I can't think right now. I mean, I like Finn, I guess. But- I just don't know!"

It was Finn's turn to stare at me. "What? Are you saying you like me?"

"I don't know! God, I'm going crazy. I'm going to move out by tomorrow. I don't think I can stay here anymore. It's killing my sanity, and I didn't have much to start with already."

Jack's whole posture changed. "Eliza, no. No, I know we didn't make you feel welcome here but we want you to stay. Please," he pleaded, coming forwards to me.

Suddenly, my heart dropped at his face. "Jack... Please don't... It's not you guys' fault, but I-I really need to leave-"

"Don't go. I've just started to know you!" Finn protested.

I closed my eyes, and thought for a long while. How could I leave when both Jack and Finn are begging me to stay? But if I stay, I would go insane- no doubt about that. "I don't know. I need to think."

"No problem," Jack said quickly. "Just don't leave."

I wish he'd said that before Finn confessed to everything. I wish he'd said this before he got together with his girlfriend. I just wish, but I guess it wasn't my choice to make, and it was too late anyways. Too late. Always too late. My timing was never right.

Maybe by the time I'd have figured everything out, Finn would have also moved on to a much better girl, and it would be my fault, as it always is.

"I just- I'll think about it."

And then I ran up to the guest room before anyone could catch up to me.

I would leave. I couldn't take the stress, I couldn't handle so much stress. I was never an emotionally strong person- even before the attack, so here I am, being all whiney and pathetic.