New Rules

15

It's been two months since you left Alex. The first few days were the hardest. Most days you stayed in bed crying. Momma K and Tara tried to get you to go out but you refused. You wanted Alex more than anything but you knew that wasn't possible right now. Many nights you were close to calling her up but you talked yourself out of it. You knew that right now the space was the best thing you could do for her.

You and Tara started working at the school about a month ago. It's been going well. You love your class and tara has been working with some amazing little kids. You've made new friends and everything seems to be going well. Tara is happy to see you finally getting better but still, it felt like something was missing. Like there was a hole in your heart. You missed her so much. You wanted to share your day with her, tell her the stories the kids tell you. You wanted to hold her and to be held by her. While you plastered a smile on your face for those around you inside your heart aches for Alex.

Over the next couple of weeks, you and tara noticed Momma K had taken a turn for the worst. So it was no surprise when you received a phone call in the middle of your class. Tara was sobbing on the other end of the phone begging you to come home. Once you had your students taken care of you headed straight to the apartment. Momma k looked awful, her breathing was sporadic, and she whined and groaned in her sleep. The doctors gave her a timeline of three days at most. The cancer has taken over most of her body by now. Tara sobbed in your arms as you two sat by her bed.

In the middle of the night momma k whimpers in her sleep causing you to wake. "Al.." she whispered. "What?" you asked her getting up from your seat to stand over her. "Alex," she says clear as day. You sighed looking over at tara. "She asked for last night too while you were sleeping." tara says. You nod your head sighing to yourself as you grab your cell. Hitting the contact that you have started at many nights you place the phone to your ear as it rings.

By the third ring, she picks up "y/n?" she asked. You inhaled sharply hearing her voice for the first time in months. "Hey, Alex. Umm, Momma k isn't doing very well. She umm. She's asking for you." you stuttered. "Okay. Umm, should I come over now? Or wait till the morning?" she asked. You sighed "now is probably best. I don't know if she" ll make it through the night." you tell her your voice cracking with emotion. "I'll be right there," she says having up the phone.

Thirty minutes later she's at the door. Tara opens it seeing Alex for the first time in a while. Alex gives her a sad smile as Tara immediately hugs her. "She's been asking for you." tara whispered. Alex nods her head sniffling "Where is she?" she asked. Tara points to her room and Alex takes off in that direction.

You and tara stayed in the living room to give them their privacy. After several attempts of convincing tara to shower, she finally agreed. "I promise ill come get you if anything happens," you tell her. She smiles nodding her head as she heads for the shower.

Curiosity got the best of you so you quietly tiptoed to the bedroom door peaking in to see Alex sitting by the bed holding Momma K's hands. Her head hangs low as she weeps "Don't cry for me child." momma k tells her. "I'm sick of all the crying. I've lived a good life. My girls are grown now, they know what to do." she says. Alex chuckled "Yes ma'am you raised two strong independent women." she says. "And stubborn as hell." momma k adds making Alex laugh.  "That girl loves you with all her heart. I've never seen her so happy with someone. You'll make it right?" she asked her. Alex chuckled "I think that's a little easier said than done Momma K."  "It doesn't have to be now. Just promise me that one day you two will come back together. A love like that doesn't just go away.  Like I said she's stubborn but she loves hard. And that child loves you, Alexandra." she tells her. Alex nods her head as more tears fall "I love her too." she whispers.

Momma k struggles to sit up but with the help of Alex, she's upright. "I want you to know how grateful I am for you. This apartment, loving y/n, tara, and myself, and the doctor bills. I can never repay you for the kindness and love you've given us." she says. "You don't have to. I did it for you, for the girls. Never with the intention of something in return." she says. "I know honey. That's because you're a very kind and loving woman. I know you don't think so but you're." she tells her. Alex huffs giving her a small smile. "Listen child I don't know who hurt you or who made you think otherwise but you're the kindest, loving, caring, and hard-working young lady I've met. You carry so much weight on your shoulders and such high expectations for yourself. It's not fair to you and those who love you. I want you to know that I love you and care for you like you are my own. Never forget that. I love you, my sweet Alexandra." momma k whispers. Alex is in tears    " I love you too." Momma k smiles before another coughing fit takes over. "Send tara in please," she tells her. That's your cue to move from the door. You quickly run back over to the counter sipping your coffee when Alex walks out.

"She's asking for tara," she tells you. "I'm here." tara answers walking out the bathroom freshly showered heading into the bedroom. Silence takes over as you two look at one another. You smile "Would you like some coffee?" you asked. She smiles nodding her head. She takes a seat at the barstool smiling as you hand her a cup. "Thank you," she whispers. "Your welcome," you tell her. "Thank you for calming me," she says. "Of course." you smile.

"So how have you been?" she asked. "Umm, okay. I mean not so good with Momma K but everything else has been alright," you tell her. She nods. "You?" you asked. "Umm, it's been good. Still doing my sessions and my anger management classes. I umm...I quit my job at the firm with dad." she says. "You did?" you asked. "Yes. It was for the best. My therapist agreed as well. Of course, a lot of healing will involve him. Whether that be dealing with it with his help and acceptance or without it." she explains. "Are you happy with that decision?" you asked. She smiles "Yes actually I am. It gives me time to focus on myself and I've thought about traveling you know just finding myself again." she says. "That's great Alex. I'm really happy for you," you tell her with a smile.
"Thank you. How's work?" she asked? "It's great. I love my kids and they keep me busy," you tell her. "I bet." she chuckles. "Alex can I ask you something?" you asked. "Mhmm." she nods her head sitting her cup down. "Do you miss me? I mean I know you're focusing on yourself and that's great. But do you ever miss me?" you asked. "Every day my love," she says. "I miss you too," you whispered. "But..." you trailed off. She nods "but it's not the right time." she finished. You nod your head "yeah." "It sucks." you chuckled. She smiles "Yes it does. But I want to be my best for you and myself. And right now I still have a long way to go." she says. "I know. Me too. I'm really proud of you Alex." you tell her. "Thank you. I'm proud of myself too. And I'm proud of you." she says. The two of you smile at one another. Tara comes walking out of the room sighing "it's going to be a long night." You nod your head. "Alex if you want to stay you can," you tell her. "Are you sure? Tara is that okay with you?" she asked. Tara nods "Yeah that's fine." "Okay well thank you. Both of you." Alex smiles.