....it isn't about what happened with del...I'm just done...if I wanna talk about it with you then..I would have sent you a message about why I want to...I'm done with life...life just keeps throwing stuff at me....the suicides...the abuse from my family...my friends forcing me to be fake....hell I told one how i wanted to die..
..told me to shut up..force a smile...no one likes a sad person...just last month my family learned I wanted to suicide...all my dad did for talking to me...was to suck it up...then blamed me cause he may loose the guns from my grandfather...only things he has from.him to give to me...cause of the school learning I wanna die....everyday is another effort to live for me....and since last time my suicide number has risen to 31...fuck...31 suicides in my life...school fucked up hahah....why am I writing this...maybe I'm hoping someone will save me...I don't think it'll help...I've wanted to suicide since birth...I've first tried to kill myself at 2 years old....subconsciously of course....but death has been my constant friend...since birth...and thanks to a certain perso yesterday.....those little whispers death has been giving me...might come true...
