Winters Night

~ Chapter Two ~

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I wake up the next morning, sweaty, I try to move and feel my body pressed onto something warm, I feel the arm around my waist. Slowly I relax, intertwining my fingers with him. Memories from last night come flooding back way too fast, slamming into me. He came, my mind whispers over and over, he came. I turn my head back and see his face buried in my back, sound asleep. I stare at him, I was broken, but... but hes here. I cannot stay broken. I close my eyes take a deep breath. And.... for the first time in 3 years, I wake up, slowly pull his arm off me, slide my feet into the slippers and the base of my bead and head downstairs to make dinner.

Depression hit me hard, around 3 years ago, my world collapsed. My mother and father died in a car accident, while I only sustained a broken arm, my then boyfriend dumped me after I had broken. But I found Bohdi, and he never left, he endured every break down, every anxiety attack. Today I think, is the day I have to get better. I finished making the bacon and eggs just as the toast pops out of our old mirowave. Resting on top is a picture of me and Bohdi, it takes me a second to realise just how lucky I am. Im smiling as I put the food on a plate and walk up the stairs to me and Bohdi's room.

After my parents died, I quit my job and had no where to go, when we first started dating he helped me look for apartments, we ended up deciding to live together. I walk into the room, and sit down just as his eyes wake up. He sees me sitting there with the food, and his eyes go wide as he jolts up, his eyes searching mine. He looks down to the smile on my lips and his eyes sparkle, I haven't smiled in years, genuinely smiled.

I look down, my smile dropping, "I'm sorry" I say, taking a deep breath my hands fiddling on top of the food I made. "I'm sorry it took me so long to realise, you make me so happy, I keep living in the past and its time I stopped. You've been with me through everything. I want to get better." The words I've been wanting to say finally bursting out of me, but this time I really meant them. "I want you get better, so I was hoping you would help me?" The last part a question, not just to him but myself too. He looks at me his mouth open, he slowly takes his hands out from out of the sheet, slowly reaches out and grabs the try from my laps and put it on the floor next to him. He doesn't say a word. He turns back to me, and suddenly jumps on me a wide smile on his face, he's laughing, the sound filling my ears. It was beautiful. He tackles me and I can't stop myself as a fit of giggles spills from my lips. He leans down and kisses me, when he pulls back his eyes stay closed. "I have been waiting 3 years to hear those words, I love you Zilla, I will always loves you, always stand by you, I will help you on this journey, but you have to promise me you wont give up. Its a hard journey Zilla, very hard but you cant give up, you have to promise me" He says, almost in a whisper, I know he is praying I say yes, hoping. I look at him, with my left hand I cup his face tracing a line under his eye, he leans into my touch as I reach my right pinky out, "I promise" I say. He opens his eyes and looks down at my pinkie, his eyes shining with tears, he takes out the hand he has under my and intertwined his pinkie with mine. "Good, my love" Tears drop from his eyes and I wipe them away.

He sits up and looks at me, "Would you like to talk about what happened 3 years ago, to get it off your chest?" His head turning sideways a little, questioning. I look down playing with the hem of my silk shirt, I take a breath and force myself to look into his eyes.