Insomnia

3

He came home from work at five and immediately stepped into the shower. When he had washed his hair and put some clothes on it was half an hour until Louis would show up. He realized that he had forgotten to give him his address and fired away a text before he went to the kitchen to start with dinner.

That inner stress that was his companion nowadays made itself present. Louis would be there soon and he wasn't done. He had merely started with dinner. He shouldn't have had that shower. A soft knock on the door disrupted his chain of thoughts.

He hurried to open it and a smiling Louis greeted him. He welcomed him and immediately started to apologize that dinner wasn't ready yet on his way to the kitchen. Louis grabbed his arm, making him stop halfway.
"Breathe. Why are you so stressed out? We have the whole night in front of us. Who cares when dinner is ready?"

Harry's mouth dropped and he looked utterly surprised, like Louis just said something he had never thought about.
"Yeah."

"Correct me if I'm wrong but I get a feeling that you put way too much pressure on yourself, am I right? I don't mean to sound offensive." Louis said as he followed him to the kitchen.

"Spot on." Harry chuckled.

"Do you know why you do that?" Louis wondered.

"Geez, deep subjects first thing." Harry said, sounding amused.

"You don't have to answer that if you think I'm overstepping." Louis replied softly.

Harry picked up the knife and continued to chop the red pepper. He glanced at Louis.
"I guess it's a low self-esteem kind of thing, you know, you're always hard on yourself."

Louis just stared at him.
"You have low self-esteem? Why? I mean, look at you, fuck, I mean, you really shouldn't put yourself down like that."

"Oh, is that how it works? So if others think you're good-looking you can't have low self-esteem?" Harry chuckled.

Louis rolled his eyes at him.
"Now you make me sound really shallow. I didn't mean it like that. I guess I was surprised."

Harry smiled and shrugged his shoulders. He put the pepper in the pan and fried it. The pasta water started to boil so he added the pasta.
"So what are you making?" Louis asked and looked over his shoulder.

"Chili shrimps. I hope you're not allergic? I should have asked you that beforehand." Harry stressed.

"I'm not. I love shrimps. Relax curly." Louis smirked.

"Curly?" Harry questioned.

"Suitable. You have all these lovely locks." Louis grinned and gestured at his hair.

"Thanks." Harry replied and added some crushed tomatoes and shrimps to the pan.

Ten minutes later they sat down to eat and Louis complimented him on his cooking skills.
"Do you enjoy cooking?" Harry asked which set Louis off in a fit of giggles.

"Honestly, I'm terrible at it. I mean, I try but...yeah."

"I'm sure you're not that bad." Harry tried to reassure him.

"Oh trust me, I really am." Louis laughed.

"Let me be the judge of that. Next time you make dinner." Harry said.

Louis giggled.
"Fine. Suit yourself."

After they were done eating they retrieved to the living room. Louis sat down on the couch and yawned.
"Sorry."

"Please, I'm exhausted, you must be ten times worse." Harry said softly.

"Yeah, this whole insomnia thing really takes a toll on me." Louis said and rubbed his eyes.

"Same. So do you wanna tell me about your mum?" Harry asked, afraid that he was overstepping.

Louis hesitated.
"Ehm, she got leukemia and she passed away a couple of months later. I went really fast."

"I'm sorry. I lost my stepdad to cancer a while back. Horrible disease." Harry said compassionately.

"I'm sorry for your loss." Louis replied softly.

"Thanks. So what was your mum like?" Harry asked.

A soft smile spread over Louis' face.
"The best mum ever. We were really close. I'm the oldest of my siblings. She was a single mum, raising me. It was the two of us. Then she met Mark and I had four sisters. When they got divorced she was a single mum again. She always worked hard. She was a midwife. So caring. She had a wonderful laugh and..." Louis' lower lip started to tremble and he burst out crying all of a sudden.

He hid his face in his hands.
"I'm sorry, I..."

Deep sobs emerged from his chest. He was crying like the was no tomorrow. Harry froze for a second but then he pulled Louis in for a hug.
"Hey, breathe Louis."

Louis clutched his t-shirt and held on like he was drowning while he cried his heart out. His sobs were so full of despair that it brought tears to Harry's eyes. He held him tightly and rocked them back and forth.

He had no idea how much time went by but Louis' sobs slowed down until it was just a sniffle.
"I'm sorry. It's the first time I have cried since she passed. I think I've been in a numbness shock. It finally hit me. Me mum is dead. She's really gone." Louis' voice was thick with emotions.

"I'm here for you." Harry answered simply. He didn't really know what to say.

"I'm really embarrassed." Louis muttered and tried to pull away but Harry wouldn't have that. He hugged him closer.

"Please don't feel embarrassed."

Louis sighed and nuzzled closer. He took a couple of deep breaths and relaxed. Harry stroked his hair and back. They didn't speak. Louis' breaths became deeper and he leaned heavier against him. Harry removed Louis' hair from his face so he could glance at him just to find him asleep. His heart felt all mushy inside. He slowly leaned forward, taking Louis with him, and grabbed the blanket behind them. He wrapped it over Louis and leaned back, trying to get comfortable without waking up the sleeping boy half on top of him. Luckily the remote control was laying next to him so he turned on the tv and made sure to mute it. Louis moved a little with a sigh and was resting his head on his chest now. This was going to be a long night but Harry didn't mind. Louis desperately needed his sleep and he had no problem being a pillow. A half-hour later he drifted off to sleep as well.