A Young Victim

part 3.

"Hey, are you going to church today?"

My mother had awaken me from the longest depressing slumber it took me so long to enter. It had been a week since I was molested, and I still felt bare. Things would never be the same. I would always feel his hot breath against my neck as I cried myself out of consciousness. I didnt want to go to church, but I knew it was the only way for me to get it out of my system... out of my head. All I knew was, I didnt want to see him ever again, and I wanted my life back.

I ejected my body from the bed and began to take a shower...

...then clothes...

...then shoes...

Without saying goodbye, I rushed out of the door and took the long way to church. It was during the fall season, so I didnt mind taking the long way. I loved to walk. Walking gave me a sense of stability mentally. I could be in my thoughts and talk to myself all day when I take long walks, and of course I had a lot to think about. My pastor would notice if something is wrong with me, so it is best for me not to walk in acting anything other than normal. For some reason, christians have a certain sense of humility when it comes to knowing if someone isnt acting as such.

I walked into church, glad that the man I saw last week didnt drive beside me this morning. I spent the whole time afraid that I would see the guy from last week. I fellowshipped with some of the congregation as church ended and played with some of the children. For a quick minute, I began to forget the abuse I received from the guy, but I didnt take away from the physical hurt.

It had been a couple hours since church had ended, and I began to walk home. The day was hot, causing everyone to stay inside during the peak of the day. I stopped at the store to buy a few snacks and proceeded my way home. When I turned the corner, I SAW HIM, posted at my front door. I could tell no one was home. He caught a glimpse of me and called out my name. I froze as he walked near me. This man could con a con man with how friendly he was. He asked me if he could talk to me and I followed. We both got into the car and he started to talk. During the first few sentences, all I could think about is the perfect get-a-way if he tried anything. Then he said, "Let's go get something to eat."

He started the vehicle, and my body became to tremble in nervousness. We drove around the corner and stopped at the local restaurant. We parked, unbuckled, and  walked in. The restaurant was so run-down, but the food was so good. Ya know? Those rickety food places in the hood? Everyone has those.

He ordered us both a 2 piece fried chicken meal with mashed potatoes and a medium drink. We both waited patiently until his name was called.

"RICHARD??"

Huh? His name was Richard? Never had I known his name nor had he told me his name, but he had some way of knowing my name perfectly. He grabbed the food, and we walked back out to the car. We sat, ate, and listened to music. No words were exchanged. The quietness had been a clue for me at that moment that he ecpected something after the meal, and I was not willing to give him. Not anymore.

After we both finished our food, he threw both of our trash away and returned to the car. Still, no communication. He started the car again, and again, my body began to shiver in nervousness. This time, he did not take the route to my house.

"Where are we going?"

No words.

I stayed silent and then we stopped. We were behind an abandoned building. I turned to him and he was staring right into my eyes. He, then, began to rub my back softly as if it would calm me down. He leaned in, assuming to kiss me, and I pushed him back.

"I dont want to do this."

"I just bought you food. You need to do something."

He then gripped my arm a little more aggressively. This moment brought back memories to when I first met him. I snatched away from him and started to get out of the car. He grabbed the back of my jacket and seized it. I ran out of the car and ran as far as I could so he couldn't find me. I ran into a gas station and stayed there for an hour. After I left, I returned right home where I saw my mom and two brothers. I went to bed, and woke up later that day to eat dinner and got ready for school that next morning.

After that day, I hadn't seen him ever again...

...UNTIL...

9 years later.

By this time, I had moved back to Wisconsin and was in college. It was spring break, and I decided that I wanted to visit my grandmother. While I was viviting her, I saw him walking down the street. I was driving, and the sight of seeing him made my body shiver just like when I was younger. Ever since then, he has been DEAD to me.

A night to never remember has reared its ugly face.